Dirt Sheet
by Breathe Artistic
Summary: Serah Carlisle is a complex woman. She's dedicated to her job, has an interesting reputation among her coworkers, and an almost paralyzing fear of commitment. Everything her heart knows changes when Nick Nemeth and Mike Mizanin walk into her life and one of them starts turning her feelings inside out.
1. Chapter 1

Okay, so I know I have a couple of fics that are already in the works, but this one will be a quick moving update as I've already written most of it. I've developed a significant love for Dolph Ziggler and this fic will feature him quite a bit. I hope you all enjoy! 3

* * *

Cody rolled over, his arms reaching for the redhead he thought would be waiting for him.

But I wasn't there. No, I was in the shower, ready to get out of there and head to the airport for our flight in two hours. He'd be disappointed, but I wasn't concerned. I never stayed long, he knew that.

"Serah?"

He called my name and I pretended not to hear. I'd left the bathroom door open wide enough so he'd hear me in the shower, maybe take the hint. Cody was always a stubborn one about me leaving. I heard the door creak slightly and knew he obviously didn't. I saw his shadow growing smaller across the floor as he approached the curtain. I jumped when he pulled it open, because that's what he'd expect.

"Dammit Cody! You scared the hell out of me," I exclaimed. "How about a little warning next time babe? A cough or something."

Cody chuckled, stepping into the shower behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pressed his lips against my neck. An involuntary moan creeped up my throat, the man knew what to do with those lips of his and I was a woman who appreciated those fine God-given tools he was blessed with. Cody nipped at my neck with his teeth, his hands creeping down my hips, pressing me back against him.

I groaned, but moved my head, cutting off his contact. "Cody, I was almost done."

"Well what's wrong with starting again?" He said, kissing the other side of my neck. "We've got time."

"Sure if you wanna take a cold shower," I teased, and wiggled my hips a little. "Not that I don't think you could use one."

Cody laughed in my ear, his fingers creeping closer to the space between my thighs. I pulled away and turned to him, and kissed his lips gently. I stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around me. I heard Cody groan as I slipped out the door and back into the bedroom. I was dried and half dressed by the time Cody appeared again. He stood against the door frame with a towel around his waist and his hands on his hips.

"What?" I asked as I wiggled into my skirt.

"Why do you always do this?"

I sighed. "Cody, we've been through this a million times..."

"And nothing ever changes?" He interrupted.

"No! And I keep telling you it won't, and you won't let it go," I said. "Nothing is happening between us but sex. I told you that from the beginning and I meant it."

"Serah this is stupid," Cody said, pushing away from the door. "You're incredible. Amazing. Talented..."

"Oh Cody, you know you're my favorite," But he wasn't. "I just don't want a relationship. Not with you, not with anyone. And all those pretty words are nice, but they're not going to make me your girlfriend."

I looked over my shoulder at him and he was giving me that disapproving look he always gave when I walked out his door. Cody was getting clingy, and I didn't do clingy. I stopped having sex with Drew Galloway because he got clingy, too. He's the reason I added _recent divorcees_ to my "no touch" list. I slid my feet into my shoes, adjusting the straps around my ankles and stood up. Cody was still frowning at me and I sighed.

"Maybe this isn't going to work anymore." I said.

Cody's frown deepened. "What do you mean?"

"I told you from the beginning. We're nothing more than physical. I'm not a relationship girl. I don't want a boyfriend. I don't want to be anyone's girlfriend." I said, crossing my arms. "I don't want you to have feelings for me. And if that's where this is going, then I think we should cut this short."

I turned away and gathered the few things I had spread across the room and shoved them into my suitcase. I knew this day would come and it didn't matter one way or another to me. Cody was a friend, a friend who just so happened to help me satisfy my sexual appetite. The sex was good, it was damn good, the feelings however, were not. I pulled my suitcase behind me, prepared to leave when Cody finally spoke again.

"So that's just it? We're done?" He said.

"You say that like we were ever something to begin with," I said and finally turned to face him. "See you at work, Cody."

I opened the door and pulled my suitcase along without a backward glance. Just like that, the convoluted sexual relationship between Cody Runnels and I was over. We went back to being coworkers and I wouldn't think twice about it. Well, I'd forget about it, Cody may hold onto what once was for a while. But to me, it was over.

I headed down the hall and pushed the button to call the elevator. I smiled when the doors slid open and the one and only John Cena was behind them. I'd known John since 2001 when he was on his way out of Ohio Valley Wrestling. I'd started training there and stayed until the company ceased affiliation with them and moved along to Florida Championship Wrestling, where I was lucky enough to be picked up again. John and I became fast friends, bonding over the fact that we were both vintage car fanatics. We'd tried having one of those non-relationships I was so famous for before he got back with his high school sweetheart and got married. Now we were just friends. He was one of the few guys I worked with that I considered my friend, and because of that, off limits.

John looked up from his phone when the doors opened and grinned. I pulled my bag along with me and leaned against the wall. "What's up, Cena?"

"Same shit different day. What's up with you, girl?" He said.

I shrugged as the doors closed and we started to descend. "Not much. I just... broke up, if you will, with Cody."

"Aw, has my little girl settled down finally?" John laughed.

"Bitch please," I rolled my eyes. "You know I don't do that relationship bullshit. No, he was starting to get clingy and I don't like that. I figured it's best just to end it and not have to go through that. We're coworkers and nothing more now."

It was John's turn to roll his eyes at me. He didn't exactly approve of the way I went about skirting around relationships. He thought I had intimacy issues. I had no problem with being intimate, I just didn't want to stay that way.

"So he became a Drew?" John said as the doors opened.

"Yeah. You know how I feel about that stuff. I'm not looking for anything serious," I said, as we headed out of the hotel. "It's just not what I want."

"Is it what you'll ever want, Serah?" John asked.

I sighed heavily. "Probably not. I don't need or want that stuff. But I am a woman with other needs and sex is fun for me. I don't _need_ a boyfriend to have sex."

We paused at John's rental car. "I just want you to be careful kid."

"You're such a sweetheart John, but don't worry about me. I've been doing this for long enough to know when to get out of dodge if I have to."

John chuckled and patted my shoulder. "Well, you know I'm here if you need anything."

I smiled and stood on my tiptoes, kissing John on the cheek. "I know, Superman. Thanks."

John rolled his eyes, but laughed anyway. I waved as I headed to my own rental car. John was always telling me how worried he was about me, being the way I was. As far as I was concerned, I had everything under control.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm not a whore. I never have, nor will I ever sleep with any of my coworkers for personal gain. There's always going to be people who talk, whether it be behind your back or to your face about things they have no idea about. Other women in particular. There are plenty of women who will bitch about society's double standards when it comes to the acceptable amount of sex men and women have, but when they finally meet a woman who has sex like a man, they jump on the bandwagon and call her a whore. I don't have many friends among the women backstage because they all think I'm some kind of skank who sleeps with the guys to get ahead in this business.

I know women like that. I've worked with women like that. That's not me. If I'm going to get ahead in my job, it's because I'm talented in the ring, not in the bedroom. None of the girls seem to understand that, so we don't exactly talk. We get along well enough to have decent matches in the two minutes we're usually allotted but once the match is over, we part ways without another word. I don't mind, as long as the professionalism is there, I'm not worried about what the other girls think of me.

But then there are days like today when I'm just not in the mood for crap and it seems that the apes want to continue to throw it my way. The Women's lockeroom was crowded when I walked in that afternoon and the first thing I heard when I opened the door was my name coming out of Barbara Blank's mouth.

"Serah's a slut," She said. "We all know it. And now she went and dumped Cody? Go figure."

I sighed loud enough to get their attention. "Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, _Barbie_."

The group seemed to gasp as one and those on the outside of the circle turned to look at me. Barbara was standing in the center as the circle became a line, her arms crossed over her chest.

"I don't know what you mean." She said smugly.

"You don't know what that phrase means, or you can't understand what I'm saying?" I said. "Either way, I wouldn't put the misunderstanding past you. But your ignorance continues to baffle me. What I mean is..."

"I know what the phrase means," Barbara snapped. "I just don't know why you chose to use it in reference to me."

"Well then you really are as stupid as people think you are," I said, shaking my head. "You shouldn't make assumptions about people when the rest of the world makes the same assumptions about you. The difference between you and me is, I have the guts to admit what I am, and have the proof to deny what I'm not. You on the other hand, just sit and whine and pout when someone says something oh so hurtful to you. Then you have the nerve to say the same things about others. You're a hypocritical bitch, Barbie."

Her jaw dropped and I smiled at her. I knew this wasn't going to make my any friends, but I didn't care. I also wasn't about to let her drag my name through the dirt, not when she had no room to talk about anyone.

I turned on my heel, ready to leave the room. My hand was on the doorknob when I stopped, and turned half-way back to look at them all. "Oh, and by the way girls, if I come back and find my stuff tampered with again. Heads are gonna roll."

I turned back and walked out the door without another word. The other women and I may not ever be friends, but they certainly weren't going to push me around. I headed down to the catering room and there I found, sitting all by his lonesome over a cup of coffee, Mike Mizanin.

Mike was always an interesting guy to me. Sometimes he was a little too much Miz and not enough Mike. Sometimes when the two blended together perfectly, when Mike filtered through just enough of Miz's obnoxious overconfidence and let it blend with his cute, almost sheltered small-town nature, he was one of the best guys to be around. But lately, Mike hadn't been much of either of his selves. He'd gone through a tough breakup a few months back, and getting knocked back to mid-card status after a glorious, must-see run as WWE champ had shaken his confidence.

I walked over to him and sat down. He didn't look up until I started tapping my fingers on the tabletop. He glanced up, a small smile crept over his lips.

"Serah Carlisle. To what do I owe the pleasure?" He said.

"Pleasure's all mine, Mr. Mizanin," I smiled. "I just saw you sitting here all by your lonesome and figured I'd come offer my company."

Mike's smile grew and he sat up a little straighter. "You look ravishing today, Miss Serah."

I giggled. "Charming. So how are you doing lately. I've noticed you've been a little down in the dumps."

Mike sighed heavily. "It's been rough. I'm trying my hardest but I don't know what else to do. It's like... I've just fallen off the face of the planet and it sucks. I wanna be where I was before. I wanna have that spot again. I don't know what else to do."

I frowned, reaching over and patting Mike's hand. "Chin up. You're a champion. Regardless of whether you have a belt or not. You've got what it takes and you know it. I believe in you, Mikey."

He smiled briefly, but it soon dropped into a frown. "Serah... you... you're dating Cody, right?"

I laughed. "No. No, no. I don't _date_."

"Really? I saw you with him so much..."

"Cody and I hung out a lot. We've got common interests but we weren't dating," I said. "But, to clarify, I'll go on a date, but I don't do relationships. Just not my style."

"Okay, so then you wouldn't mind if I asked you to go to dinner with me after the show tonight?" Mike said, his smile returning quickly.

"How could I refuse our most must-see champion?" I said, winking. "Of course I'll go. That'd be nice."

"Great! So... I'll meet you after the show?" Mike said.

"It's a date."

* * *

I take great pride in my job. I've worked and trained and busted my ass to get where I am. It's a shame that the women's division in the company doesn't get the developmental time and respect we deserve, but somehow, I think that even if we did, some of the girls we have wouldn't be able to keep up with the pace some of the rest of us are capable of working at.

Two weeks ago I started a feud with Eve Torres. For the first time in a long time, I was working as a baby face. They'd thrown me into the storyline as what I could only think of as a joke from the creative department. I was the one objecting to Eve's poor treatment of Zack Ryder. Her using him to get ahead in the business. Considering he was mid-card at best, Eve could have chosen better. I know that word travels fast backstage and I had a feeling that they were trying to make a point to me, pitting me against Eve with the gimmick she had going. A lot of people, the girls in particular, thought that about me. That I was the girl that laid down to move up. Tonight I had a mixed tag match with Matt - a.k.a. Zack - against Eve and her partner, who just happened to be my date for later tonight, Mike.

I was grateful for more than two minutes to wrestle a match, but I knew it was only because of the boys. Eve and I would only get one shot at being in the ring, but I was determined to make the few spots we had shine. This was my job, and I took it very seriously.

Somehow, though, I'd managed to let Matt talk me into wearing matching colors tonight. So my usual teal short shorts and white glittery bra-top were replaced in color by his normal purple and orange. I'd refused to wear the 'broski' headband on my head and settled for wearing it around my thigh like a garter. I met up with Matt at Gorilla position, he was bouncing from foot to foot behind the curtain.

"Hey! Lady Broski," He grinned big as I approached, throwing an arm around me. "You look great! Ready for this?"

I chuckled softly. "Ready as ever."

I put on a smile. I had to, working as the good guy. Out there, in front of the fans, I was Dahlia the brand new baby face who'd earned and embraced the love of the fans after years of working as a heel. My smile sagged a bit when our opponents approached, Eve with her arm draped around Mike's waist, giggling like an idiot.

"Oh, look," Eve sneered. "Matt, you've got yourself a real hoeski."

Mike pulled her arm from around him. "Stop it, Eve."

"Aren't you clever, Torres," I snorted. "Did it take you all day to come up with that? Did you do it all by yourself? Or did the other girls help you?"

"Hey, ladies, come on," Matt said. "No need for all that. We're all adults here, stop the name calling."

"You shouldn't sound so upset," Eve said. "I'm sure you, just like everyone else backstage, has heard of the reputation that follows Serah around."

"That doesn't mean everyone has to listen," Mike said, sounding annoyed. "Some of us are able to form our own opinions about people."

"So she's laid down for you too, Mike?" Eve snickered.

I felt Matt tense beside me, his arm twitching like he was going to grab mine to hold me back but I stood still. Mike's face turned furious but I only laughed at her.

"That's just you proving how stupid you really are, Eve. Spreading rumors about me in the faces of people who wouldn't believe you to begin with," I said, planting a hand on my hip. "Honestly boys, I'm not worried about it. The uneducated will always talk out their asses because they like the sound of their own voice. It's ineffective however, if no one is listening."

With that, I turned away from Eve and Matt's music cued up across the arena. The last thing I heard was Mike's soft laughter before Matt and I headed out the curtain.

* * *

"The following mixed tag-team contest is scheduled for one fall," ring announcer, Justin Roberts began. "First, making their way to the ring, the team of Dahlia and Long Island Iced-Z, Zack Ryder!"

Dahlia followed behind Zack, fist pumping and grinning. She slapped hands with the fans before running up the ring stairs, ducking into the ring as Zack held the ropes open for her. The two stood in the center of the ring, fist pumping and yelling Zack's signature "Woo! Woo! Woo!".

"And their opponents, the team of Eve Torres, and The Miz!"

Miz marched down the ramp with Eve strutting behind him, primping and ignoring the fans. The two got into the ring, Eve taunting Zack Ryder. Dahlia stepped in between them, pushing Eve back. Eve charged forward at her, only to have Miz pull her back and shove her towards their corner. Dahlia and Eve took their places on the apron of the ring while Ryder and Miz started off the match. The men locked up in the center of the ring, Miz getting the upper hand and pulling Ryder into a headlock. Ryder worked his way out, throwing Miz to the ropes. Off the rebound, Miz knocked Ryder down with a shoulder block. Miz posed, taking a moment to trash talk Ryder before grabbing him up off the mat. Ryder struck back with a series of three elbows to the stomach. Ryder fired off another elbow to the side of Miz's head and threw him into the ropes, knocking him down with a big clothesline.

Ryder picked Miz up from the mat, throwing him into his corner. Ryder went for a big corner splash but Eve tagged herself into the match. She ducked into the ring, flicking her hair over her shoulder and smiling at Ryder. Confused, Ryder attempted talking to Eve, asking her why she acted the way she had. Eve simply laughed, yelling Ryder that he was a loser and slapped him across the face.

Having seen enough, Dahlia jumped into the ring, pushing a stunned Ryder out of the way and tackling Eve to the mat. Dahlia got to her feet, bouncing off the ropes and hitting Eve with a front-flip leg drop. Dahlia went for a cover but Eve kicked out after a two count. Dahlia pulled Eve up but Eve landed a forearm shot to her midsection, causing Dahlia to back away. Eve grabbed her by the hair and slammed her face first into the mat. Eve flipped Dahlia over to her back, performing her usual booty pop before attempting a standing moonsault, Dahlia however, got her knees up just in time. The red-haired diva got to her feet, grabbing Eve up again and catching her with a kick to the stomach. Eve doubled over and Dahlia hit the ropes again, coming back with a twisting neckbreaker.

Dahlia went for a pin but Miz broke it up, grabbing her by the ankle and pulling her away. Dahlia scrambled to her feet, offended by Miz's interference and went to land a slap to his face. Miz grabbed her wrist but as he shoved her aside, Zack Ryder came flying out of his corner, hitting Miz with the Rough Ryder. As Dahlia got back to her feet, she turned around and was met with a big bicycle kick from Eve. She went for a cover, but Dahlia managed to kick out at the last second. Annoyed, Eve grabbed Dahlia up from the mat, tossing her into the corner. Eve backed up towards her corner, going for a handspring elbow, but as she was mid-flip, Ryder tagged himself in and Dahlia dropped to the apron, leaving Eve to land in the turnbuckles. Ryder jumped into the ring, taunting Eve as the crowd began to chant 'hoeski'.

From behind, however, Miz grabbed Ryder and hit him with the Skull-Crushing Finale. Miz dragged Ryder to the center of the ring and pinned him to pick up the win.

* * *

Following our match, I headed back to the Women's lockeroom to clean up and get changed before heading out with Mike. The lockeroom was empty for the most part and I ignored the girls that were there, taking the things I needed and immediately heading for a shower. Once I finished, I changed into a pair of dark, high-waisted denim shorts, a loose, flowing hot pink button down and a pair of strappy tan-colored wedges. Heading back into the lockeroom to get the rest of my things, I added a few accessories and was ready to head out.

As I headed out of the lockeroom, I spotted Cody passing by. He paused when he saw me, his lips curving down into a frown. I sighed, hitching my purse a little further up my shoulder and stopped.

"Cody." I said.

"Serah," He continued to frown. "About earlier..."

I sighed. "I told you before. That's done. You know me, Cody. And you know that what you want isn't what I want."

"Why not? We could be really great together..." He said.

"Listen. I've tired to be nice about this. I really have. But first of all, you're clingy," I said, crossing my arms. "Second of all, why is it never good enough for any of you that it's just _not what I want_? I don't want to be anyone's girlfriend. I don't want anyone to be my boyfriend. I just want to _fuck_ and not be asked a million questions. I want to satisfy the needs I have as a fucking woman and not have everyone poking their noses in my business about it! So no, Cody, we wouldn't be good together because you want more and I don't."

Cody looked confused - almost offended - but I stood my ground. I wasn't about to be pushed around by these boys because they couldn't wrap their heads around the fact that I was clear about what I did and didn't want. Prepared to walk away from Cody, I spotted Mike down the hall, coming towards me. He glanced down the hall and the frown he wore turned to a scowl.

"You move on quick." He spat.

"Yeah, I do," I said nonchalantly. "And so should you."


	3. Chapter 3

First, a big thanks to **Thoughts in Chaos**, and **hyperfaerie** for your reviews! And another big thank you to those who favorited and followed this fic so far! I'm glad you have enjoyed it thus far and hope you continue to! :D

* * *

Mike took me to a nice little steakhouse for our post-show date and I had a great time with him. Mike was hilarious and charming and kept me laughing the entire night. He was nothing but a gentleman the whole time. We'd made it back to the hotel well after one in the morning and, like the sweetheart he'd been, Mike walked me to my room and kissed me on the cheek goodnight. I showered and changed into comfortable clothes immediately after getting back, jumping into bed to call my brother.

It was a custom we'd instituted when I started traveling full-time with the company. He wanted me to call him every night before bed, assuming I wasn't completely exhausted. He was four years older and intensely protective of me. He was also the most loving person I knew. My brother and I were everything to each other. Our parents had all but disowned the both of us, each for our lifestyles. For me, I'd expressed from my teenage years that I didn't believe in monogamy. I didn't want to get married, or have children. By the time I turned eighteen, I hadn't changed my mind and my parents - my mother most specifically - decided that I didn't fit into their familial ideals. At twenty-seven years old now, I hadn't spoken to my parents in nine years. For my brother, our parents stopped speaking to him long before they stopped speaking to me. When my brother turned eighteen he told the family he was gay. My parents and their strict beliefs kicked him out the next day.

So my brother Joey - or Jojo as I'd always called him - and I were the shunned black sheep of the family. We stuck together, held each other up, I'd even moved into the house he shared with his boyfriend after my parents and I had our falling out. He was the most important person in my life. Jojo never judged me, never asked me to be something I wasn't. He just supported me and loved me like I did him.

Jojo answered the phone after three rings. "Hi baby!"

"Hey big brother," I said. "How are you?"

"I'm fantastic! I saw you on TV tonight," He said and I heard a little yappy bark in the background. "Your baby misses you."

Jojo babysat my corgi-husky mixed puppy, Bonnie, when I was on the road. "Aw, she always knows when I'm on the phone. Has she been good?"

"Of course. Always a little angel she is," Jojo said. "So, what's new in your world?"

"I went on a date tonight," I said, getting up to go dig my phone charger out of my suitcase. "With Mike."

"Mike? As in The Miz?" Jojo asked.

"Yes sir," I plugged my charger into the wall behind the bedside table. "He was really sweet. A total gentleman and generally fun to be around. He's absolutely hilarious too. I had a good time."

"So are you not doing Cody anymore, then?" My brother asked.

I had a set of ground rules for the way I lived my life, and the men I chose to be with. One of my major rules was that I never, ever dealt with more than one man at a time. I'd tried that once, many years ago and it ended as one of the most devastating situations of my life.

"That would be correct," I said. "He's not so happy about it. He seems to have got it in his head that we would have been a fantastic couple. Like I hadn't told him I don't play the couple game. At all. He knew that and obviously ignored it. I don't have time for that stuff."

"I didn't like Cody all that much to begin with," Jojo said, and I giggled, picturing the sassy look on his face I knew was there. "Something about him just seemed off."

"It's done now, and I'm cool with that," I yawned. "So how's Nate?"

"He's great! He's actually giving me the stink eye right now for being up and on the phone so late," Jojo said, and I heard him kiss his boyfriend. "He knows I can't sleep without talking to my Serah."

"Well tell him I said hi," I laughed. "I'll let you go. If he's giving you the mean eye that means you have to be up early for work in the morning."

Jojo snorted. "You have to be up early for work every morning and you're always on the phone with me until all hours of the night."

"That's because I'm usually traveling and can sleep on the plane or something," I said, yawning again. "But I really should get to sleep myself anyway. I've got a media day tomorrow."

"Oh alright," Jojo laughed. "I'll talk to you tomorrow night."

"Always. Love you both." I said.

"Love you more, little sister," Jojo said. "Sleep well."

* * *

If the people behind the Be A Star initiative knew exactly how much bullying happened behind the scenes between adults within the WWE lockeroom, I personally think we'd be kicked out of the program. I was participating in one of the rallies today along with Barbie, WWE Champ Phil "CM Punk" Brooks, and Nick "Dolph Ziggler" Nemeth. Call me judgmental but out of the group of us, I could understand the presence of Phil and myself, but the other two baffled me. I didn't know much about Nick, and I didn't care to know any more than I already did about Barbie. But I'd find out today, whether I wanted to or not.

Separately, we would all drive to the arena, then we'd all pile in a car sent by the company to go to the school for the Be A Star shindig. It was an awkward car ride, to say the very least. I was sitting in the back of a limo next to Phil and staring down the long seat at Nick and Barbie. She was chattering away at the boys, while either ignoring my presence or shooting me nasty looks.

"If you roll your eyes that hard one more time they might pop right out," Phil said, leaning over close to my ear.

I stifled an outright laugh, and whispered back: "I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"She's gonna be blabbering _all day_," Phil sighed. "Might as well start tuning it out now."

"How do you think I get along in the Women's lockeroom. That's what you have to do with just about all of them." I replied.

Phil really laughed then. "Truer words I'm sure have never been spoken, Serah."

"You two over there sharing secrets," Barbie said in her plastic perky voice. "That's not nice."

"The world isn't nice K-2," Phil said nonchalantly. "You're a big girl now, you should know this."

She frowned at him. "Of course I know that. If the world was nice we'd be one less person in this car."

"I fail to see how my sitting on the other side of the car from you is impeding in your plastic fantastic life, Barbie," I said, shrugging a shoulder. "Be a star, why don'tcha."

Nick snorted, stretching his long legs out in front of him. "I'd say Serah won that round."

He looked over at me and winked. My stomach did a weird little flip-flop. Nick was hot in that I'm-a-douchebag-and-you-hate-that-you-like-it kind of way. He smiled and my stomach did another weird little wiggle and I felt my face go red. I smiled back at him and swore I saw him scoot a little further down the seat from Barbie.

Barbie continued to blather for the next twenty minutes of the car ride. Nick kept shooting me looks and Phil was maintaining a ongoing commentary under his breath that had me choking on suppressed laughter. When the car finally rolled to a stop in front of the local elementary school I was practically dancing in my seat to get out the door. My throat and face were hurting from trying not to laugh and I needed to breathe. Finally, the driver opened the door and Phil stepped out, offering a hand to help me as I scooted out of the car. My breath came out in a wheezy gasp and Phil chuckled at me.

"You shouldn't be laughing at her," He whispered. "Look where we are."

I rolled my eyes at him, but smiled nonetheless. "If they knew the bullying that goes on between adults in that place they'd kick us out of this thing."

Phil nodded. "Too true."

Once Nick and Barbie were out of the car, we were escorted into the school by it's principal and vice-principal. We were seated in a small behind-the-scenes area of their auditorium and could hear the chattering of several hundred unruly children. It was a sound that made me smile, whether I wanted children of my own or not, inspiring kids and seeing the smiles on their faces was rewarding indeed. The principal introduced us and we walked out onto the auditorium stage amid cheering and screaming from the kids. Once the children calmed down enough, we kicked off the assembly with Barbie telling her story. I fought the urge to continue rolling my eyes at her as I had on the way here. No, I had to be nice. No matter how much the company wanted us to be ourselves during these Be A Star rallies, my true self thought every word out of her mouth was a lie. I had to let Dahlia slip through, let her baby face character tamp down how much I disliked Barbie. If I didn't, I'd be on the ground laughing, and that certainly wasn't becoming of a WWE Diva who was promoting an anti-bullying campaign.

Finally it was my turn to get up and share my story with the kids. I'd only done this at one rally before and I wanted it to be just as real. I got up to the microphone, smiled and waved at the kids and when they settled down again, everything just started to flow.

"When I was your age I got picked on all the time. I know you guys probably hear that a lot but I want you all to know how true it is. All of us up here, we might be adults now, but we were all your age once," I said. "I was picked on in grade school because I have red hair, because I was short and too skinny, because I wore glasses. And as I got older, I was bullied in middle school and high school. Mostly for the same reasons, and sometimes for other stuff. Sometimes when that happens, you feel sort of lost, and confused. You feel like, no matter how many people you tell, it'll never get any better. But it does, you guys, it really does. If there's one thing I want you guys to remember it's not to be afraid to talk about it. Don't be afraid to go to an adult, whether it be your parents or a guidance counselor, whoever. Don't be afraid. I know it's scary and what people say and do can hurt, but it gets better."

I paused as kids started clapping and when they quieted again, I continued: " And if you happen to be one of those kids that bullies others, think about this. Do you have younger brothers or sisters or cousins? Would you want them to be treated the way you treat your classmates? Would _you_ want to be treated the way you treat your classmates? The school days would be so much easier, so much more fun if you didn't have to expel so much energy being mean to people who could be your friends. Think of how much more fun you'd have at school if, instead of people being bullies, they'd just be stars."

The kids started cheering again, chanting 'be a star'. I smiled, backing away from the microphone. Having a hand in the prevention, or easing of bullying of children was important to me. As something I suffered throughout my child, and even adult life, it wasn't something I wanted to watch other people suffer with. I'd grown up and found a way not to care about what people thought of me, some of these kids would do the same, but some of them wouldn't. If I could inspire, help, or change a kid's mind about how they treated others, I felt like I was using the 'celebrity' perk of my job well.


	4. Chapter 4

I didn't know much about Nick before the Be A Star rally at the elementary school but hearing the story he told the kids and watching him interact with them really made me smile. On the ride back to the arena, I shared the short seat with him - much to Phil's chagrin - and had a great conversation. When the car pulled up at the arena, Nick helped me out of the car, wrapping his arm around my waist. We walked into the arena together, and headed out to the stands, finding a place in the stands to continue to talk.

"Serah, you're an interesting girl," Nick said. "Makes me wonder why we've never really talked before."

"I don't know. I'm not a hard girl to find," I said, smiling at him. "As far away from the other girls as I can possibly get, that's where I'll be."

Nick frowned. "You really don't get along with them, do you?"

"As far as most of them go, usually no. I won't say I have a strong dislike for all the girls. I've never really had a lot of strong female friendships. Other women just never seem to like me," I shrugged. "Doesn't bother me. As long as they can treat me with the professional respect I treat them with, it's fine."

"You've tried though, I'm assuming." Nick said.

"Of course. I used to be that girl that clung onto whoever I could find, scared of being alone, but I realized that if I couldn't make me happy, then no one else could. That being alone wasn't a terrible thing. I don't need to be surrounded by people all the time. It's nice sometimes, but I don't like being dependent. I've been on my own, essentially, since I was eighteen. Except for my brother." I said.

"So you and your brother are close?" He asked.

"Mhm. Jojo's all I got. He's the only one that came to my high school graduation. I've been living with him and his boyfriend since my parents kicked him out when _he_ was eighteen. I don't know what I'd do without him," I said, smiling fondly. "He's the only person I really _need_ in this world. I'd be lost without him."

Nick smiled, putting his arm around me. "I think that's cool. My brother and I are kinda the same way. We don't get to see much of each other, considering I'm on the road and he's down in Tampa at FCW."

"Aw, your brother is a wrestler, too? That must be cool, having someone who really understands what you do." I said.

Nick nodded. "It is. Our parents were kinda freaked out when he decided he wanted to do the same thing. They're really supportive though. It's pretty sweet."

I leaned my head on his shoulder. I was enjoying Nick's company more than I expected. He was nothing like his cocky, self-absorbed Dolph Ziggler character. He was sweet and down-to-Earth. Not to mention he managed to make my stomach do odd little squirms and flip-flops every time he smiled at me. I wasn't sure what to make of the reactions I had to him. Maybe it'd been too long since a guy made me feel anything that wasn't related to sex. The feeling, in fact, was kinda scary. I wouldn't let it show on the outside, I didn't want Nick to know. And just the fact that I wanted to hide something from him confused me already.

"So, Serah. Are you seeing anyone?" Nick asked.

"No," I said. "Dating isn't really my thing."

"You're not a relationship kinda girl?" He said.

"Nope. I'm not a courtship and dating type. I think it's pointless, for me anyway. I don't knock anyone who's into that, but that's just not my realm." I said.

"I understand," Nick said, giving my shoulders a squeeze. "I'm the same way. I'm not exactly a fan of relationships. Maybe I'm a little jaded by past crappy relationships but I don't think that's what I need right now."

I sighed. Something about him understanding, accepting the way that I felt and thought was comforting. I could get to like Nick, he was fun to talk to and be around and understood where I was coming from on a lot of things. If I felt differently about it, I would date Nick. That thought alone made me feel like I'd swallowed ice and it had traveled through my entire body. Involuntarily, I shuddered and hoped that Nick didn't notice.

"You alright?" He asked.

"Mhm, just a little chilly," I said, and tried to pull out from under his arm. "I think I may go get a sweater from my bag."

Nick moved his arm from around me, and I help back a relieved sigh, until I saw it was only to shrug out of his own jacket. He draped it over me and put his arm around me again. I didn't know what to make of this. He was making me nervous.

"I'm not sure I'm ready to let you go yet, Serah," Nick said. "I like hanging out with you."

My stomach did that weird little flip-flop again and this time I couldn't tell whether it was for a good reason or not. I'd go with it, for now, until I sorted out exactly what was going on.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, I'd spent more time with Nick than Mike. While Mike didn't say outright that it bothered him, he also didn't seem to like it very much. It wasn't to say that I didn't spend any time at all with Mike. I found myself more drawn to Nick sexually, romantically, even. Though the latter scared the beans out of me. I didn't _want_ to be romantically linked with anyone, thought it seemed my stupid, needy girl heart was set on betraying me.

Nick, on the other hand, was very understanding about everything. He didn't push me to spend time with him, he didn't question me when I wanted to spend time with Mike, either. Nick just seemed to _get_ everything about me and wasn't pushy about it and I liked it. I hadn't slept with Nick, the desire it was there, between both of us. It was almost a live thing that burned between us that we could feel but neither of us acted on it. Mike, on the other hand, I'd been with. He was the same type of lover as he was a person. Vocal and edging towards over the top. Not that the sex wasn't good, but I'd had better. Though, in reality, I was breaking one of the cardinal rules of my lifestyle. I couldn't, wouldn't juggle both Mike and Nick at once. It just one of those things that I vowed to myself I'd never do again.

Today, I'd had every intention of seeing neither man and spending some time alone. We were all treated to a day off in Miami after filming SmackDown that Tuesday. Early that afternoon, I decided to take a stroll along the beach near the hotel we were staying in. I dressed in my new favorite green bikini, slid on a pair of short denim shorts, and slid my feet in a pair of flip-flops. I grabbed a towel, my iPod, and my sunglasses and headed out the door. Once outside the hotel, the beach was a short walk away. I picked a nice, semi-secluded, sunny spot and laid my towel down and stepped out of my shorts.

I'd only been laying out for a few minutes when I looked over to change a song on my iPod and saw a shadow looming over me. I pulled off my sunglasses and looked up, seeing Nick standing above me. I pulled out my earbuds out and slid my sunglasses off, sitting up on my towel.

"Hello Nick."

"Mind if I join you?" He asked.

I tucked my iPod between my folded shorts and moved them to my other side, patting the sand beside me. Nick dropped down, stretching his legs out in front of him. I glanced over at him and my stomach did its usual excited little flip flop. He smiled at me and scooted a little closer, gently resting his arm over my shoulders.

"You out here all by yourself?" He asked.

"Yup. Thought I could use a little sun," I laughed. "And maybe a little relaxation."

"Well I hope I'm not bothering you."

"Not at all. It's always nice to be around you, Nick." I said, leaning against him.

"Serah, you should let me take you to dinner tonight," Nick said, giving me a little squeeze. "We've hung out a lot, but you've never let me take you on a date. Whatdaya say?"

I thought about it for a long moment. I had a date with Mike tonight that I couldn't break in good conscience. I'd already cancelled on him once to hang out with Nick, a detail I'd left out when I broke the date. One of these boys needed to go, I couldn't do this back and forth thing anymore.

"I can't," I frowned. "I have a date already tonight."

Nick frowned as well. "Well that's no good for me. Mike's a lucky guy."

"How do you know it's him?" I asked.

"Because. He's the only other guy I ever heard you talk about except your brother," Nick chuckled. "So tell me what I'd have to do to steal you from him."

"You can't steal what's not owned," I said, draping my legs over Nick's. "Mike and I aren't dating. You know I don't do that."

"Neither do I. But I don't mind spending a little time with a pretty lady like you. So why not do so over dinner?"

"As opposed to what we usually do? Sit around and watch movies and pretend we don't want to jump each other." I smiled up at him.

"Well I'm glad I'm not the only one who felt the tension," Nick said. "I might not wanna date, but I do know how to treat a lady like one. I wasn't going to rush you into anything if you didn't want to."

"Such a gentleman," I said. "I appreciate that though. But the tension is killing me. Do you know how fucking sexy you are, Nicholas?"

"I could ask you the same thing, Serah." He smiled and winked at me.

My heart fluttered and I felt my face go red. At the same time, I grit my teeth, I didn't like these feelings but Nick constantly made them creep up to the surface. He ran his fingers down my arm and I shivered.

"I suppose it wouldn't be so bad to cancel. Just one more time," I breathed. "I hope he won't be too upset."

"Don't you worry, Serah. It'll be our little secret."

I'd called Mike once I got back to the hotel, falsely blaming my monthly 'lady problems' for making me feel under the weather. He offered to bring me whatever I needed but I swiftly declined, saying during the first day or so, I preferred to suffer in silence by myself. Though, in reality, after taking a shower to wash the sand off of me, I dressed in a form-fitting, knee length deep purple dress that had lace at the top. I dug a pair of strappy gold stilettos out of my suitcase, put on some jewelry and switched the essential things from my larger purse to a small purple clutch. I slipped my key card into the purse with everything else and headed out the door.

Nick was waiting for me down in the lobby, dressed in black slacks with a teal blue shirt under a black blazer with black sneakers. He looked absolutely gorgeous with his white blond hair slicked back, leaning casually against the wall near the door. He grinned broadly when I approached him.

"Serah, Serah, Serah. You are positively stunning." He said.

I smiled at him, linking my arm through his. "Why thank you. You look dashing if I do say so myself."

Nick grinned and pulled me close to him, I inhaled his scent. Goddammit he smelled good. Clean and some kind of earthy cologne, but not too much like most men tended to do. With his arm around my shoulders, we headed out of the hotel. He led me to his rental car and once we settled in, he zoomed out of the parking garage and out into the city. We went to an Indian restaurant for dinner and that surprised me. It was my favorite type of food and I couldn't recall ever telling Nick that, and when I asked he only shrugged and said it was a lucky guess. After dinner, we headed back to the beach near the hotel we'd met at earlier that day. I slipped off my heels and walked barefoot arm-in-arm down the beach with Nick while we talked. It was one of the sweetest nights I'd had in a long time. Nick was a great person to be around and something about being with him that night made me not want to leave his side.

We'd been walking along the beach for about half an hour when we finally made it back towards the hotel. Nick walked me up to my room and when we stopped outside the door, he leaned down and kissed me. He wrapped his arms around me and I threw one around his shoulders, standing on my tiptoes, kissing him back. When we pulled away I landed flat on my feet again, resting my forehead on his chest.

"I'm not sure I want to leave you yet, Nick," I said despite myself. "I had a really great time tonight."

"So don't," He said and kissed the top of my head. "Let me stay with you tonight."

"I need to grab a quick shower, and call my brother. How about I meet you at your room when I'm done." I said.

"Okay," He agreed and kissed me again. "I'm in 615, come up when you're ready."

I nodded, pulling my keycard out of my purse and waving at Nick as I pushed the door open and slipped inside. I stripped off my dress and headed straight to the shower. When I finished, I changed into a pair of black shorts and a thin yellow t-shirt, tying my wet hair into a braid. I dug my phone out of my purse and sat on the edge of the bed, tapping my brother's name in my recent calls list. After the third ring, Nate - his boyfriend - picked up.

"Hello Serah." He said.

"Hi Nate! How are you, darlin'?"

"I'm doing great! You looking for Jojo?"

"Yes sir, is he asleep already? Cos if he is just tell him I called, I don't want to wake him up." I said.

"No, no he's up. He just went to let Bonnie out before bed," Nate said. "Hang on, here he is."

After a moment, Jojo's voice flowed down the line. "Hello little sister!"

"Hi, Jojo," Then without hesitation I said: "I just went on a date with Nick."

"Nick? Who the hell is Nick?" Jojo said, confused. "I thought you were...playing with Mike."

"Nick is Dolph Ziggler on the show, Jojo," I sighed. "And I am... sort of. I don't know, I think... I might actually kind of have feelings for Nick."

"You? My Serah? Actually admitting to having feelings for a boy after how long? My goodness this Nick character must be pretty special. I mean he'd better have more personality than he does on TV or else I'm going to have to veto that one off break," Jojo said. "But he is a fine specimen of a man if I do say so myself."

I laughed. "That he indeed is. But I don't know. We went on a real date tonight, not just hanging out and talking and _not_ fucking like we usually do. This is so strange to me. He's just like me, Joey. He doesn't want a relationship but he wouldn't mind being physical but we _haven't _been yet. But every time I'm around him it's like my guts turn to Jell-O and my heart beats faster. I don't want all these stupid feelings."

"Serah. I understand how you feel, but maybe... just maybe that's okay. It's okay to let yourself have a little crush on him. I think he might feel the same way about you if you guys have all this chemistry between you and he hasn't tried to sleep with you yet." Jojo said.

"And then there's Mike. I need to stop this. I can't deal with the both of them." I blurted.

"What's going on with Mike?" Jojo asked.

"Nothing more than the usual. We just kind of hang out and I've slept with him a few times but he doesn't do the same things to me that Nick does just by _looking_ at me. I like Mike as a person, as a friend... but Nick makes me feel all... girly and dumb." I said.

"Maybe you really do like him, Serah. What's so wrong with that?" Jojo said carefully.

"You _know_ what's wrong with that." I said stubbornly.

Jojo sighed. "I know babycakes. Just be careful and make good decisions. You and I both know how you feel about this so you need to cut something loose and by the sounds of it, your heart is trying to tell you it's Mike."

I groaned. "My heart can fuck off as far as I'm concerned. It's screwed me over before and I don't intend on listening to it and letting that happen again."

Jojo clicked his tongue at me. "Sometimes the heart makes mistakes, just like the human. But sometimes the heart picks the right thing for you, Serah. It's okay to listen to your heart _and_ keep your head on straight."

"Thanks, Jojo," I sighed. "I gotta go. Need to get some sleep...and Nick's waiting for me."

I'd contemplated leaving out that last part, but Jojo would have picked up on it anyway. He just had a way of doing that with me somehow.

"Ooh? What's going on there?" He giggled.

"Nothing that I know of," I said. "I sort of told him I wasn't sure I was ready to leave him tonight and he asked if he could stay with me. So I told him I had to shower and call you first but I'd meet him when I was done."

"Oh! Well girl go on! If things happen, have fun, if not I'll talk to you tomorrow night."

"You'll talk to me tomorrow night regardless, big brother." I said.

"I know," He said, yawning. "I'll let you go though. I love you, Serah."

"I love you more, Jojo."


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up the next morning in an odd tangle of limbs with Nick. Somehow during the night I'd managed to work one of my legs between both of his. My head was resting against his chest, one of my arms was draped over his waist and the other was tingly and numb under my abdomen. One of Nick's arms was wrapped around my shoulders while the other was tossed over the other side of the bed and his head was tilted down towards mine. Aside from numb fingers, it was comfortable, it was nice being all wrapped up around a man with all my clothes on.

I shifted, pulling my arm out from under me, wiggling my fingers to get some feeling back into them. Nick moved slightly, his arm tightening a little around my shoulders. I repositioned my arm and curled up a little closer to him. I drifted off to sleep again for a little while until I felt Nick move again. This time he pulled his arm gently from underneath me, laying me back down against the pillows. The bed creaked as he got up and I cracked one eye to watch him. He stretched, reaching his arms up towards the ceiling and I couldn't help but admire. Nick looked as thought he'd been chiseled from stone from the front and back. Even standing in front of me in as little as his boxer briefs, that man was almost literally mouth-watering.

I shifted a little and Nick turned back, catching me. I opened my other eye and smiled at him. He kneeled back onto the bed, crawling towards me. He gently cupped his hand behind my head and pulled me up, kissing me. I wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling his body closer to mine. Nick grabbed me at my waist as well, pulling me up while he shifted into a sitting position. I settled myself on his lap, straddling his waist as we kissed. I toyed with his hair, twirling his curls around my fingers. Nick grabbed at my hips, squeezing them tight as I'd - unconsciously as I could tell - started to grind my hips against his.

"Stop that," He growled, playfully nipping my bottom lip. "You're so fucking bad."

I kissed him again and laughed. "You started it."

"I know I did," Nick locked both his arms around my waist, pulling me up and he got to his knees, laying me down in front of him. "But not yet, not all the way. It's not right yet. We will have this, Serah, just not now."

Something about the way Nick said that sent a shiver down my spine. If the intensity in his voice was anything to go by, he meant it with everything in him. He leaned forward and kissed me again. That kiss was full of heat and promise and if physical action could make my heart shake, that kiss would have done it. Nick pulled away again and I felt breathless. I stared at him for a few moments before finally regaining myself.

"You know the only thing we have is sex, right?" I said softly.

"No, we have friendship, Serah. There's nothing wrong with that, right?" Nick replied, sitting back against the headboard.

I sat up as well, wrapping my arms around my legs. "You're right. I suppose that's kind of new for me. I don't usually make friends with the men I sleep with."

"And that's fine but this is something you'll come to learn about me," Nick said, giving me a crooked little smile. "I like to be different, unexpected."

My heart was thudding against my chest so hard I thought Nick could hear it. "Call me spoiled but I'm used to getting my way with things like this."

"I'll give you your way," Nick winked. "But why not make it fun for both of us. I like to chase, and you, Serah, are certainly worth chasing. Whether our relationship is purely physical or anything otherwise."

* * *

I'd gotten a text message from John as I was walking back to my room from Nick's that morning. He was standing outside my door when I finally got there. He raised an eyebrow at me, or likely, the way I was dressed but simply shrugged a shoulder and followed me inside after I unlocked the door.

"What's wrong with you, Superman?" I said, dropping down on the floor in front of my suitcase.

"Shit's bad, Serah," He sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Married life is the pits right now."

"That's exactly why I plan on never joining the married life," I chuckled, peering over my shoulder at John. He didn't laugh. "What's the matter, Johnny?"

I got up, sitting on the bed next to him, wrapping my arms around his waist. John was my best friend in this place, one of the few people I trusted fully. Though we'd once had one of those not-relationships, he was the only one I'd consider a true friend after it all ended. He was like a brother to me now, someone who took care of me in my real brother's absence. John Cena had helped me out of a few tight situations, it was the least I could do to listen when he had problems. I might not be able to offer him much advice, but that was hardly ever what he wanted. He just wanted someone to listen to him vent, so he could expel whatever negativity was weighing on his mind.

"Things just aren't good right now," John sighed heavily. "We've just been fighting all the time and it's stressful. I don't even know what to do. It's never been this bad before. I know the occasional fighting and stuff is pretty normal for married folk but I don't think _this_ is normal."

"What kind of stuff are you guys fighting about?" I asked.

"Everything. Work, the house, my schedule, her schedule. It's getting goddamn ridiculous."

I frowned, giving John a squeeze. "I'm sorry. I wish I knew what to tell you."

"It's all good Serah. You know me, just needed to get it off my chest," John said, throwing an arm around my shoulders. "One day, it'll be alright again. I just hope it's soon."

I smiled. "Always looking on the bright side, you."

John shrugged. "You gotta. No sense looking at the bad stuff. That'll just bring you down."

I nodded, dropping a kiss on John's shoulder and went back to my bag. "I suppose you're right."

John laughed. "So. Where did you just come from all half-dressed?"

I made a face at John, throwing a pair of jeans I'd pulled out of my bag at him. "Nick's room."

"Nick? I thought you were 'not' dating Mike." John said.

"That's what Jojo said," I sighed. "I don't really know what's going on with Mike. But I think... I might actually..."

"Have feelings for Nick that aren't just physical?" John finished.

"I already admitted that once in twelve hours, I'm having a bit of a hard time doing it again." I said.

"Serah... I don't think I've ever really tried to get into the why you don't do relationships with you," John said. "But we're friends, right? We're cool and we trust each other."

"You're the only other person I really trust other than my brother and his boyfriend, John." I said.

"Then you wanna tell me what the deal with that is? I mean, if you feel like talking about it." John said.

I shrugged. "I wouldn't be any good at relationships. Every single one I've ever had has failed for one reason or another. I try not to deal with them."

"What do you mean every single one?" John asked.

"Every important life relationship I've ever had has been fucked up, John," I said, shaking my head. "Everyone except me and Jojo. My parents hate me, they think both Jojo and I were mistakes. I can't tell you how many times I've heard them say they got the short end of the stick on children. The few romantic relationships I've had in my life have ended in shambles. I just don't see the point in doing it again. I don't have a lot of close friendships... everyone I've gotten close to has either hurt me or abandoned me. I don't want to get that close to Nick because I don't want him to do the same to me... but I don't think I can help it..."

I let my sentence trail off, the realization of it feeling like a punch to the chest. I knew, in the back of my mind exactly why I didn't want to fall for Nick. I was afraid of it. Afraid of those emotions and the pain that normally accompanied them for me. But voicing them was different. Hearing the reasons come out of my mouth was difficult to deal with.

"I understand what you're saying," John said. "But, not every future relationship is going to end up the way the past ones did. If you're interested in Nick, why stand in the way of that happiness?"

"I'm happy the way I am, John." I said flatly.

"No you're not." John countered.

I glared at him but felt the look was hardly effective. "You don't know that."

"Maybe I don't, but the way you just talked about all that doesn't sound like a happy person," John said. "I understand if you're scared to go into something with Nick, but that doesn't mean you should try to deny your feelings for him. Maybe he feels the same way about you?"

"Nick doesn't want a relationship either," I said, frowning. "He told me."

"So have you guys...?" John paused, thinking carefully about his words.

"No, we haven't," I laughed, shaking my head. "He said not yet, it wasn't right yet."

"And is that what you want?" John asked.

"Not particularly, he's got me a little _frustrated_ if you know what I mean," I sighed, digging a few more things out of my suitcase. "But he says he 'likes to chase', and he thinks I'm 'worth chasing' no matter what our relationship ends up as."

"Sounds to me like he's looking for a little more than he's letting on," John said. "I don't pretend to know Nick very well but he seems like a guy with a decent head on his shoulders and if he's chasing a beautiful girl like yourself..."

"Stop it, Superman. I'm not that kind of girl, you know that." I said.

"I think you need to give yourself some more credit, Serah. There's obviously something about you that he really likes, and considering you two haven't done anything dirty yet it's clearly not just about your body," John said. "I just so happen to know first hand that body is a glorious thing, but I also know that the girl inside is a pretty great person too. And if you've let him in this far, maybe that is the next step for you two."

"You know, I don't like it when you get all Dr. Phil on me," I stuck out my tongue at him and got to my feet. "I'm gonna grab a quick shower. Stay here and we'll go to an early lunch or something?"

"You only don't like it when I don't tell you things you wanna hear," John threw my jeans back at me. "Go on, you take forever to get ready anyway, it'll be lunch time by the time you're done."


	6. Chapter 6

It'd been a few days since I'd seen Mike, and he caught up with me as I was heading into the arena for RAW that Monday afternoon. I was on the phone with my brother when he approached me and hadn't been paying attention until put his arm around my waist. I shrieked and almost jumped out of my skin.

"Are you alright?!" Jojo asked.

"I'm fine," I panted, swatting Mike's arm. "Michael just startled me."

"Oh! Should I let you go?" Jojo said.

"I'll call you back later sweetie," I said. "I love you."

"Love you more, Serah-bear." Jojo hung up and I dropped my phone into my purse.

"Didn't mean to scare you," Mike said, his words sounding clipped. "Who was that, if you don't mind me asking."

I raised an eyebrow at him, shifting the handle of my suitcase to my other hand. "My brother. Why?"

Mike exhaled. "I just... no, nevermind. It's stupid."

"Were you jealous, Mike?" I asked teasingly.

"Maybe a little," Mike admitted, his shoulders sagging. "I've missed hanging out with you, Serah. I feel like I haven't seen you in a while."

A flash of guilt zinged through me but was extinguished as fast as it appeared. "I'm sorry, I know we missed our date a few days ago."

"So maybe we should reschedule for tonight," Mike said, tugging me closer. "I've missed you a lot."

I smiled at Mike, letting him drop a kiss on my cheek. "I think we can manage that."

He smiled back, releasing my waist, walking beside me as I headed to find the Diva's lockeroom. Mike was silent for a long stretch and for him, that was strange. Normally I couldn't get much of a word in with Mike unless his mouth was otherwise busy.

"Can I ask you a question?" Mike said.

"Of course." I said.

"I don't want you to get upset with me for this, okay?" Mike said, jamming his hands in his pockets.

"Mike, come on. Just talk to me." I said.

Mike sighed heavily. "The other day, when we were supposed to go out. Someone told me that they saw you. Out on the beach with Nick."

My heart felt like it jumped up into my throat. "Who told you that?"

"Eve," Mike frowned. "And I know its crazy because you and Eve have always had problems and stuff and she's not the most trustworthy person around..."

Mike was rambling on and I had to do something to stop it. The guilt I tried to push aside jumped back with a vengeance.

"Okay, okay Mike, stop," I said, holding my hands up. "Stop and listen. You aren't going to like my answer but you deserve to know."

Mike frowned. "Okay..."

I blew out a breath. "I canceled to go out with Nick. It was wrong of me and I'm sorry. I don't really know why... he asked and I said yes," I sighed, pushing my hair out of my face. "I don't really know what's going on in my head, this is really uncharted territory for me. There's something going with me... in my head, in my heart... whatever, and Nick is part of it."

"Do you love him or something?" Mike asked sourly.

"No, I don't," I said flatly. "I'm not really sure what it is I'm feeling about him but it's there. I'm sorry you had to find out that way. I'm sorry it happened and I can't take it back. I never should have done that."

Mike was silent for a long stretch and silence from Mike was always a cause for concern.

He sighed heavily. "I guess its something you told me. I don't like it but at least you told me the truth."

"I'm really not in the business of lying to people, Mike. I try to keep myself as honest as possible. I am so sorry for what I did. I understand if you have a bad opinion of the situation or you're upset with me over this. I take full responsibility for that."

Mike let out a slow breath. "Oh Serah. Of course I don't like the situation but I totally respect you for owning up to it. The thing is... the thing I'm really worried about is that... it seems you've really taken a liking to Nick, and well, I really like you..."

I held up a hand again. "I honestly don't know exactly what it is I'm feeling about Nick. Like I said before, it's there and I don't know how to deal with it," I said. "And it's not that I don't like being around you, and it's not like I don't like hanging out with you. The way I see it, right now, I've got two pretty good friends. Both of which I enjoy spending time with. I don't want you to feel jealous of Nick, especially if I don't even know what's going on. The fact is that none of us have a terribly exclusive thing going on, and Nick knows that too. Going forward, on an honest level, if I'm going to hang out with you, then I will. If I'm going to spend time with Nick, I will."

Mike's frown deepened. "Do you really want both of us in your life like that?'

I shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know yet. But there's nothing wrong with spending time with your friends, right?"

"You really don't want any kind of important relationship like that in your life at all?" Mike said, but the look on his face said he immediately regretted it.

"I have all the important relationships in my life that I need," I said sharply. "I'm telling you this just like I've told Nick. There's only two men in my life that will ever be that important to me and that's my brother and his boyfriend. They take care of me and they love me the way I am. I don't just let people in that easy."

"Would you ever?" Mike asked.

"I don't know. Someone would have to give me a real good reason to do that ever again," I said, this conversation was making me antsy and I wanted it to stop. "So far, no one has accomplished that, so I'm content how I am."

"I didn't mean to offend you, Serah. I was just curious." Mike said.

"It takes a lot more than that to offend me, Mike," I said. "You didn't know that about me and I suppose I should have told you. Like I said, there's sort of a lot on my mind with all this right now. Nick... could be important to me, but that doesn't mean I want to throw away whatever friendship we have."

Mike went silent again and I sighed. I wanted to be honest with Mike about what was going on. I wasn't trying to hurt anyone intentionally and if me exploring things that made me uncomfortable was the key to keeping the peace in my life then I would do what I had to.

"Alright then. I guess that makes sense," Mike said slowly. "I guess I could have asked you about it too, instead of drawing my own conclusions."

"If I'm being totally honest and I think that's what you deserve, it's not an easy thing to do to get to know me on a deep level. I don't trust people and I don't let people in easily."

Mike reached out for me, his hands gently gripping my hips again, pulling us to a stop. "I'll do whatever it takes."

"That's the thing, Mike. I don't want you to," I said softly. "I like where we are. I don't want anything further than that. I don't mind sharing basic stuff with you, I really don't, but I don't want it to go any deeper than that. I don't want you to have feelings for me beyond what we already are."

"That's not something you can help you know." Mike said lowly.

I nodded, sighing. "I know. Trust me I really do."

Coming from the girl who constantly abandoned and denied her feelings, I understood more than he could ever understand.

* * *

Despite our interesting conversation earlier in the day, after the RAW finished, I still took Mike up on his offer to go out for dinner. I'd showered at the arena after my match and changed into a pale pink skirt with a beautiful lace overlay, a short black bustier top with a ruffled white cardigan over it and the most amazing rainbow-colored snake-skin print heels Jojo had gotten me for my birthday. We'd dropped our bags off in our respective hotel rooms and met up in the lobby again once we had everything settled. I chose a sushi bar in the city I'd always heard about but never really had the chance to visit.

"So, Serah," Mike said as we were seated. "Do you have any other siblings than the brother you talked about earlier?"

"No, it's just Jojo and I," I said. "He's my everything. My brother, my best friend, my guardian. He's the single most important person in my life."

"That's cool. I had no idea you guys were so close." Mike said.

I nodded and pushed the sushi menu towards him. "We're kinda two peas in a pod, me and him. We're four years apart but that never really made a difference to us. Well, ya know, I suppose if you count Nate, it's like having two brothers. We're an interesting little family."

"Who's that?"

"Jojo's boyfriend. He's the sweetest guy ever and I couldn't be happier for my brother," I said, smiling proudly. "Nate's pretty amazing."

"So what about your parents? Are you close with them?" Mike asked.

I smiled blandly and shook my head. "No. We don't speak."

"You don't talk to your parents?" Mike paused to hand the waiter our menu and thank him. "How don't you talk to your parents?"

"It's pretty easy," I said dryly. "They don't respect me for who I am, and I don't respect them for trying to force me to be something and someone I'm not or ever will be. I don't respect them for the things they've done to my brother and I. They made the choices they made and now they've got to lay in the beds they've made. They seemed pretty comfortable last time I checked."

Mike frowned. "That's really sad. I'm sorry to hear that, Serah."

I waved him off. "Don't be. I'm better off the way I am," I smiled at the waiter when he brought our drinks, taking a sip of mine. "God, Mike this is depressing. Let's talk about something else."

"Right. How about that ass-kicking you gave Eve tonight," He grinned. "You are seriously one of the most talented girls we have."

"Oh stop," I laughed. "I do have to say that it's always a pleasure to kick Eve's ass. Especially when she tries to get me in trouble with my friends."

"Heh, yeah," Even in the dark of the restaurant I could see Mike blush. "But if she hadn't told me... would you have?"

I frowned. "Yes. I would have. Look, I don't want you to think I'm just that girl who every word out of her mouth to you is a lie."

"That's not what I think at all, Serah." Mike said quickly.

"Good. I just hope it can stay that way." I said. "Now, can I ask you a question?"

"Definitely. Go for it." Mike said.

"Okay, maybe it's less of a question, and more of an... observation. Something I noticed since we've been talking today and don't quite understand," I said, swirling the straw around in my glass. "Why is it... that you seem to have such a problem with Nick?"

Mike chewed his bottom lip, quite for a short stretch, before finally speaking.

"Nick and I used to be cool. We had kind of a falling out a few years ago," Mike admitted. "We sorta went our separate ways after that. We're civil and stuff but we don't hang out or anything like we used to."

"What happened? If you don't mind me asking." I said, genuinely curious.

"We trained, very briefly, together in OVW. He came back after that whole Spirit Squad thing for a while. We had a couple of matches but nothing major. Then we were both on SmackDown for a few months and we hung out sometimes. It was cool but then something happened and he disappeared for a while and when he came back it was like he was a different guy."

Mike paused again when the waiter brought our food to the table. I snapped my chopsticks apart and picked up a piece of sushi, chewing and swallowing before speaking again.

"Different how?" I asked.

Mike shrugged a shoulder. "Things just weren't the same. We'd traveled together for a while and when he came back it was just different. We had a stupid fight about something and haven't really been friends since."

I tilted my head, considering Mike carefully as I chewed. "What did you two fight about?"

"I can't even remember at this point," Mike said with a shrug. "It was years ago. Probably something dumb."

I nodded, picking up a piece of ginger with my chopsticks. "So you guys have just been at odds ever since?"

"I wouldn't say at odds, but we weren't exactly friends anymore," Mike said, making a face. "You're awful interested in this situation."

"Maybe. But I just wanted to know. It is sort of strange when you're in the middle of two people who don't necessarily seem to like each other. I'm just trying to learn more about both of you, that's all," I said, pointing my chopsticks at Mike. "But now really, enough. I'm not talking about work anymore, I'm not talking about Nick anymore. This date is about us and nothing more, okay?"

Mike gave me a little smile, nodding his head. "Alright, deal."


	7. Chapter 7

A week after I finally went out with Mike again, on a nightly call with my brother he informed me that he had some vacation time coming up and he wanted to come travel with me for a few days. Not to mention his boyfriend had a modeling job coming up that coincided with where I was going to be on tour. So two weeks later, John and I were at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport waiting for Jojo and Nate to head up to the terminal to meet us.

I was beyond excited to see my brother. So excited in fact that I hadn't been able to sit down when we got to the airport and was practically dancing in my spot and John was laughing at me.

"Will you calm down, dynamite kid," John laughed. "I'm sure he'll be up here soon."

"I can't! It's been forever since I've seen Jojo! And even longer since I've seen Nate, he was away working last time I was there." I said, dancing from foot to foot.

John shook his head, pulling his hat down a little further over his eyes. We'd been trying to be as inconspicuous as possible walking through the airport to avoid large groups of fans. I'd broken that, however, when excitement took me over and I started running towards the gate and the hood of my sweatshirt fell off. We met a small but extremely excited group of fans and stopped for quick autographs and photos before I got too antsy and wanted to get moving again. It turned out we made it to the gate with plenty of time to spare because the flight they were on had been delayed slightly.

"Serah, seriously. Sit down, you're making me anxious." John said.

I wasn't listening because I was off and running again. I'd spotted Nate's sun-blonde hair and knew Jojo wasn't far behind and wanted to get to him immediately. Jojo dropped his bag when he saw me coming and wrapped his arms around me as I collided with him.

"Serah-bear!" He exclaimed.

I squeezed him with all my strength. "My goodness I missed you so goddamn much!"

"I've missed you too superstar girl," Jojo said, kissing my cheek. "It's so good to see you!"

I let my brother go and turned to Nate, throwing my arms around him. "And you! I've missed you too, supermodel!"

Nate laughed and squeezed me back. "Back at ya, darlin'. Good to see you."

Jojo picked up his bag and we headed up the ramp to the gate exit. John was looking around for me when we came back, still laughing when he spotted us.

"John, meet my brother Jojo, and his amazing boyfriend who, for all intents and purposes, is my other brother, Nate," I said, grinning. "Guys, this is John Cena."

John shook both their hands, smiling. "Nice to meet you both. I've heard a lot about you guys from Serah."

"Only good things, of course." I giggled.

"Well its nice to meet you, too," Jojo said. "I've heard tons about you, too. I'm glad to know someone's taking care of our girl while she's traveling."

John smiled. "Of course. Serah's a great girl. It's been real great to get to be friends with her all these years."

I grinned, my arms wrapped around my brother's waist. "Aw, shush Superman. You're too kind."

"You guys ready to get out of here?" John asked.

I nodded and we headed towards the baggage claim to pick up Nate and Jojo's luggage. Once we picked everything up, we headed back to John's rental car and headed to the hotel. We got them a room and bid John goodbye so I could spend time with the two best guys in my life. I settled into the office chair at the desk, spinning around so I could look at both of them.

"Nate, how long do we have you?" I asked.

"The rest of today but I've gotta be on site at five in the morning." Nate said.

"Bummer," I frowned. "But after that are you free to hang out?"

"Oh yeah. Most definitely," Nate said, stretching out across the bed, resting his head on Jojo's thighs. "It's a much needed vacation for both of us."

"I wish I could just stay and hang out with you guys the whole time," I said. "But I'm just so excited that you guys are here."

"So Serah," Jojo said, looking pointedly at me. "Tell me what's been going on with this Nick situation."

"I don't know. It's not like anything has happened," I said, shrugging. "I actually haven't seen him in a couple of days."

"Do you miss him?" Jojo teased.

I rolled my eyes at him, but smiled anyway. "Maybe."

Jojo laughed. "Oh my little Serah. It's so cute to see you so conflicted over this boy."

"Shut up," I said. "It's complicated."

"Isn't that what they all say," Nate joked. "Don't complicate it, darlin. Just go with what you feel."

"See why I keep him? He's a smart man," Jojo laughed, dodging Nate's playful swat. "You know we both understand exactly what the deal is but I also think, deep down, you want something like that. You don't want to admit it but it may be there."

"So... what do you think makes this Nick guy so special that he's worked his way all up in your feelings?" Nate asked.

I shrugged a shoulder. "I really couldn't tell you. He's just... different. He's a sweet guy and he just really seems to understand me. I've spent more time getting to know Nick than I have any guy - except John - in years. He's so passionate about what he does and I can really relate to that with him. We've had a lot of really good, long talks about all sorts of stuff. It's really nice. A change."

"Seems to me like you finally found someone worth you, Serah." Jojo said.

I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. "Don't you even start with that, Jojo. You know it isn't gonna happen."

"Never say never little sister," Jojo said, smiling down at Nate and giving his shoulder a squeeze. "We all meet our match eventually."

I sighed, watching my brother and Nate. They were perfect together, absolutely. Seeing Jojo that happy made me happy. We'd both been through so many struggles and watching him with the love of his life brought me great joy and pride. It also, occasionally made me think. Maybe someday it would be nice to have the type of loving relationship that Jojo and Nate had, one day. But when that day came, Nick might not be there if he had to wait too long. That thought terrified me more than I'd ever admit, even to my brother.

* * *

"Do _you_ want to meet Nick?" I asked Jojo after Nate left for his photoshoot the following morning.

"Do you want me to meet Nick?" Jojo countered.

"I... I guess so. Maybe you meeting him will relieve some of the nervousness I feel about the things going on with him and I." I said.

"What are you so nervous about Serah-bear? Just go with the flow baby!"

"I don't even know where the flow is going," I blew out a breath. "But I think the stamp of approval from my big brother will make me feel better if something does eventually happen."

"Well, why don't you call him and we can go out for breakfast. Or lunch if you want to wait for Nate." Jojo said.

"How long is he going to be gone?" I asked.

Jojo thought for a minute then laughed. "I have no idea. Could be before lunch, could be before dinner, actually."

I rolled my eyes at my brother. "Well that's a lot of help."

"Just being honest!"

"Okay, then why don't we do breakfast? He's probably up already and at the gym," I said. "I'll call him and then get dressed and stuff."

Jojo nodded. "Call him up girl!"

I hopped off the edge of the bed, grabbing my phone from the desk. I crawled back onto the bed, pressing my phone to my ear, waiting for Nick to answer.

"Hey stranger." He said, sounding a little out of breath.

"Hey you," I said. "Getting your cardio on this early in the morning?"

"You know me," Nick laughed. "Work, work, work. What can I do for you this morning, pretty lady?"

"Well, my brother and his boyfriend are traveling with us for a few days and I wanted to know if you wanted to come have breakfast with Jojo and I this morning," I said. "After your workout, of course."

"I was actually just finishing up when you called," Nick said. "I'd love to come have breakfast with you guys."

"Great! So why don't you call me when you're dressed and ready and we'll meet downstairs?" I said.

"Sounds perfect. I'll see you soon." Nick said.

"Okay, see you in a bit."

I hung up with Nick, dropping the phone on the bed beside me. Jojo was grinning at me, looking like he was about to explode.

"You are so cute," Jojo laughed. "I can't wait to actually see you together."

"Shut up," I said, swatting at him. "I'm gonna go get dressed, I'll be back in a few."

I kissed my brother on the cheek and headed out the door. My room was a few doors down the hall and once I got back, I jumped in for a quick shower since I'd jumped straight out of bed to say goodbye to Nate before he went off to work. I slipped on a pair of light blue distressed jeans, a black top that was sheer along the shoulders and down the sleeves, and a pair of black flats. I grabbed my purse, shoving my hairbrush inside and headed back to Jojo's room, knocking on the door. He opened it after a few seconds and smiled, waving me inside.

"You are too cute! Now girl please let me do something with that hair." Jojo said, grabbing my shoulders and pushing me towards the desk chair.

"You know me too well," I laughed, sitting down. "I was going to ask if you could."

"Did you bring a brush or something?" He asked.

"In my purse. There's probably some other stuff in there you can use. Hair ties or clips or something, too." I said.

"I got this, don't worry."

Except for one of girls backstage and his boss, Taylor, Jojo was the only person I really trusted with my hair. He worked as a hairstylist at home and was one of the best I knew. He pulled the top of my hair into a braid, gathering the rest into a ponytail that he twisted and pinned into a low bun just behind my left ear. My phone rang as Jojo was putting the last few pins in my hair. He glanced over at it, handing it to me.

"Hello Nick!" I said.

"Hey Serah. I'm all set whenever you guys are." He said.

"Great! We'll be down in a few minutes. Won't be long."

"Good. You know... if you don't mind me saying, I missed you these last couple of days, girl. It'll be nice to see your beautiful face again." Nick said.

I felt my face go red and my stomach did its usual Nick-influenced flutter. "Stop it. I'll see you in a minute."

"Looking forward to it." Nick said.

I hung up and dropped my phone into my purse and smiled back at my brother.

"Ready?" I asked.

"As long as you are, little sister." Jojo said.

I nodded and slung my bag over my shoulder. We headed out the door and to the elevator. The doors slid open when we reached the lobby and I smiled when I saw Nick. Dressed in a pair of dark blue jeans, a pink v-neck shirt with his usual black sneakers and his white hair slicked back, he was just too handsome. I smiled at him as we approached and he grinned back, wrapping me in a hug when I got close to him.

"Nice to see you, stranger." Nick said.

"You too," I gave him a squeeze. "Nick, I want you to meet my wonderful older brother Jojo. And Jojo, this is Nick Nemeth."

Nick let me go and stuck his hand out to Jojo. "Nice to finally meet you. Serah talks about you all the time."

Jojo shook his hand, smiling. "Nice to meet you too. I'm sure I hear an equal amount about you from my dear little sister. She hasn't talked this much about a guy in too many years to count."

"That's an honor to hear," Nick said, smiling. "Serah is a truly remarkable girl."

I was positive my face as almost as red as my hair. I smacked both men on the forearm, crossing my arms over my chest. "Stop it you two! I'm standing right here you know."

Jojo just laughed, smiling at me. "Well, jetsetters, where to for breakfast? You're the great travelers, I'm excited to see the places you may know around here."

"I do know this one place," Nick said. "Me and Matt have been there a few times when we come to Atlanta. It's a pretty sweet place."

"Lead the way, Mr. Nemeth. I'm looking forward to this." I said.


	8. Chapter 8

The restaurant Nick took us to was a fun, hip little place that was only open from four in the morning until noon. They served strictly breakfast and simply walking into the place and smelling all of the amazing food cooking made my stomach growl.

"Nick, where in the world did you find this place?" I asked as we were seated. "It already smells amazing in here."

"By accident really," He admitted. "If you ever have to travel with Matt for any reason, don't let him be your navigator. He's got an awful sense of direction. We got lost once and ended up coming here for breakfast. So when we came back months later, we tried to find it again and couldn't. We drove around Atlanta for two hours before we finally decided to Google it, and they were closed by the time we finally got here."

"This place has to be serious if y'all drove around for two hours just to find it." Jojo said.

"Wait until you try the food. You'll totally understand the wild goose chase we went on for it." Nick said.

Our waitress appeared at the table a few moments later to take our orders. We thanked her as she left and Nick spoke up again.

"So, Jojo," He paused, biting his bottom lip. "That's cool for me to call you, right? That's not a family only thing is it?"

Jojo waved a hand at him. "Of course you can. I prefer it, actually."

"Okay, cool. So what do you do? What fills up most of your days?" Nick asked.

Jojo smiled. "I'm a mild-mannered hairstylist by day. Metal-infused mutant by night."

Nick laughed. "Wolverine, eh? I'm a Gambit fan myself."

"Oh he's a strong second," Jojo grinned. "But no, seriously, Wolverine I'm not but I do have a liking for athletics and things of the sort."

"Jojo is an amateur boxer. He doesn't like to brag about it but he's amazing at it." I said, smiling proudly.

"Boxing? That's hardcore," Nick said. "Wrestling is one thing but boxing is a different animal entirely, I don't think I could do that."

"I've been boxing since I was thirteen," Jojo explained. "It started out as a way to let out some extra aggression but as I got older and started to really understand the strategy and psychology of the sport, I just fell in love with it. I've been doing it ever since."

"He came really close to winning the Austin Regional Golden Gloves a few years back," I said. "Are you still training to enter again?"

Jojo nodded. "Mhm. If not this year, then next year."

"That's really awesome," Nick said. "Maybe you could show me a few things sometime. That'd be an awesome thing to incorporate into wrestling."

"I'd love to!" Jojo said. "That would be great! Nate's not really interested in boxing himself so it'd be great for me to be able to school someone new."

"Speaking of. I heard a lot about him, too. Someone's missing." Nick said.

"He's working," I said. "Nate's a model. He had a photoshoot today. We're not sure what time he'll be done but he'll be with us as soon as he is."

"That's awesome. You guys are a diverse little family." Nick said, smiling.

"We're all each other has, for one reason or another. It's pretty nice that we all do something different," Jojo said. "But at the same time it gets kinda lonesome when both of them are traveling. I wouldn't have it any other way though."

I smiled over at my brother, squeezing his hand. "How's my baby, by the way? I miss her so much."

"She's a sweet little devil," Jojo laughed. "She's started sleeping under your bed again. She misses you."

Nick raised an eyebrow. "Should I ask?"

I laughed. "My dog. Her name is Bonnie and she's a brat. But I love that little dog to death."

"What kind of dog is she?" Nick asked.

"A corgi-husky mix," I held up a finger and dug my phone out of my purse, showing him the display screen. "She's a heartbreaker. Can't say no to that little face."

"Too cute," Nick grinned. "She's precious."

I dropped my phone back into my purse and a few moments later our waitress came back to the table with our food. While we ate, the conversation continued to be light and playful. Jojo really seemed to like talking to Nick and that made me happy to see. For the most part, I stayed quiet, letting the guys talk and get to know each other. They'd bonded over a similar love for sports and Nick's guilty pleasure for fashion. It made me smile to see my favorite person in the world enjoying someone who, even if we went no further than where we were, could be very important to me in the coming months of my life, getting along.

* * *

"I think I'm kinda upset that y'all went to breakfast without me this morning." Nate joked, chuckling.

"Aw, don't be upset babe," Jojo said, giving him a squeeze. "I do have to say that it was a very nice morning. Nick is a good guy."

I rolled to my other side on the end of the bed to look back at Jojo. "So you like him?"

"Look how excited she just got!" Jojo laughed loudly. "Yes I liked him! And he seems to really like you a lot, Serah."

"Oh, and you got to meet the famous Nick? Now I'm really jealous." Nate said.

"He asked about you this morning, said I talked about you a lot and he wanted to meet you," I said. "And you'll get to meet him. There's a house show tonight that I totally have passes for both of you to go to and we have a day off tomorrow. So Nick sent me a text a few minutes ago and said a bunch of us were gonna go and do something after the show and asked if we wanted to come."

"That sounds like fun! What do you think we'll be doing?" Jojo asked.

"I have no idea," I said, pulling my phone out of my back pocket. "I'll ask Nick and see if he can get some more details."

"So are they super cute and sugary around each other or what?" Nate drawled as I typed a message to Nick.

"They're stinkin' adorable. And neither of them wants to admit that they're feeling anything for the other. You can tell though, you can see it the way they talk to each other or the way he hugs her when he sees her or leaves her." Jojo said.

I ignored them, pretending to look through my phone while they talked.

"Or the way she blushes when anyone talks about him around her," Nate said. "She just looks all giddy and excited to see him."

"Mhm. You're very right," Jojo said, poking my in the behind with his foot. "I know you're listening, Serah Dahlia."

I rolled my eyes. "Y'all can stop talking about me like I'm not here."

"Then you should have spoke up, missy," Jojo said. "I like Nick, and that's what you said yesterday you wanted to know. But now I wanna meet Mike."

"Why do you wanna meet Mike?" I asked.

"I have an idea," Nate said. "Since you got to talk to Nick, why don't I talk to Mike?"

"Ooh! I like that! And we can compare." Jojo said.

"Hey! Still here! Why do you wanna meet Mike!" I said, waving my hand at them.

Jojo rolled his eyes. "Because. I wanna know what it is about this one you can't seem to let go. Especially since you've got a damn good one on the line."

"Is it the sex?" Nate asked.

I almost rolled off the bed. Most of the time, Nate wasn't that blunt, that was Jojo's usual territory. Nate was a southern gentleman if I'd ever met one and usually found a subtle way of asking such personal questions. A true sign my brother had rubbed off on him.

"No...I mean...it's not bad by any means but that's not to reason," I said. "Mike is a great guy. He's a friend and in case you two haven't noticed I don't come by those very often..."

"A friend with benefits. And those you've had plenty of." Jojo said.

"Well to be honest those have been less friends and more benefits," I admitted. "But Mike is really a friend. Who just so happens to be pretty good in bed. I don't want to hurt him...but he knows we're not going to be anything more than what we are. And he knows there's...things going on with Nick."

"What kind of things?" Nate asked.

"Not the same things going on with Mike," I said pretending to ignore his pointed look. "It's a really weird feeling I have about Nick. I can't really explain it. It's like something I can see but can't reach."

"Oh Serah. I want you to fall in love with this boy so bad," Jojo giggled. "You two would be like Ken and Barbie's humble and much more attractive red headed friend with just as much ambition."

I did fall off the bed then, this time laughing. Nate and Jojo fell into fits of laughter with me as I tried to pick myself up off the ground. I kneeled at the foot of the bed, my sides and cheeks hurting from all the laughter. If there were any one thing I missed the most about being at home it was these moments with my brothers where we all piled in one bed, laughing until we cried.

Eventually we all tried to compose ourselves. Wiping tears from our cheeks and gasping for breaths. Jojo looked down the bed at me, his cheeks red but his eyes slightly serious.

"But honestly, Serah. I know how you feel about it...but maybe...he could be the one to change everything."

I sighed, pulling myself back up onto the bed. "The thing that really scares me deep down is that I really seriously thought of that. But I'm afraid. I'm really truly scared, you guys. With the exception of both of you, every important relationship I've ever had has gone to shit. Every guy I've seriously dated has hurt me. Y'all remember that. Y'all know what I went through. I don't ever want to do that again. Obviously I have some pretty basic womanly needs that have to be fulfilled because me and celibacy don't get along. It's easier this way. Or at least it was."

"Until Nick came along?" Jojo said.

"Exactly," I said with a sigh. "I don't know what to do. I like being friends with Mike, but judging on conversations we've had he sounds like he wants more than that. And I don't. Not with him, maybe not even with Nick."

Nate frowned. "Serah. You know I love you right? And it's my job as your practical brother to be completely bluntly honest with you. I think it may be in your best interest to explore this. Carefully, but maybe just try it. If something good happens then wonderful. If something bad happens and Jojo and I are here for you and you can move along."

I leaned my head against Nate's knees. The point he made was completely valid. But nonetheless I had trouble trying to accept it. Though, at the same time it scared me to think that my waiting around might cause me to lose whatever chance I had with him for good.


	9. Chapter 9

I had a match at the house show that night against Eve and Beth Phoenix. House shows were always fun for us because we got the chance to really interact with the fans in a way we didn't get to when the cameras were on. This show was particularly fun for me because I could hear my brother and Nate in the front row cheering for me. After the match - even though I didn't get the win - I was able to jump onto the steel barricade and hug them both. When I got backstage after the match, the first thing I saw was Nick, upside down, doing some strange handstand push-ups. I watched, until he flipped himself back onto his feet, standing upright. His face was red when he turned around and saw me, smiling.

"Didn't expect to see you there." Nick said.

"You continue to impress me, Mr. Nemeth," I said, looking him up and down appreciatively. "That body is insane."

Nick reached forward, grabbing my waist and pulling me against him. "I could say the same for you. I watched your match, you looked amazing out there."

"I'm glad you watched. Thanks," I smiled. "As much as I hate to leave this, if you let me go I'll watch yours, too."

"Fair enough," Nick smiled and leaned forward, dropping a kiss on the corner of my mouth. "I'll see you later? You and your brothers are still down for tonight, right?"

"Yeah, we'll be there," I said. "Any idea what's happening yet?"

Nick dropped his arms from around my waist and shrugged a shoulder. "Nope. But I'm sure we'll figure it out."

I nodded. "When's your match?"

"Main event baby!" Nick grinned.

"Right were you belong," I winked. "I'm gonna go get cleaned up and changed and I'll go watch, okay?"

Nick nodded, dropping another kiss on my cheek as he swept by me. Smiling, I headed back to the lockeroom to get showered and changed. Considering I didn't know what we were doing after the show, I changed into a pair of gray jeans, a black lace tank top and a pair of black sneakers. I threw a hot pink hoodie on over top and pulled my hood up, heading out towards the arena again. There was always a spot in each arena for house shows where talent could go and watch matches if we wanted without being swarmed upon by fans. The main event was just starting when I took my place to watch. Nick was wrestling Sheamus and the match was amazing. They put on a great performance. Athletic and brutal, everything most people liked about seeing Stephen - Sheamus - and Nick individually when in the ring. Put the two of them together and it was fool-proof. Nick didn't pull out a win in the match but the crowd was so hot that no one seemed to be in their seats by the end of the of it.

I retreated backstage again after the match and headed to the catering room to sit and wait for a bit of the crowd to clear out before I could go and find Jojo and Nate. I was in the middle of sending my brother a text to explain when I noticed a shadow above me. I looked up and saw Mike standing there, smiling down at me. I hooked my foot around the chair beside me and slid it back a little, gesturing for Mike to sit.

"What's up, Mike?" I asked, sending the message I'd typed and sticking my phone in the pocket of my hoodie.

"Not much," He said, dropping down in the chair I'd moved. "Are you busy tonight?"

"I am, kinda," I said. "Apparently there's some big shindig happening with a bunch of us and Nick invited my brothers and I to come along."

"Oh? What's going on?"

I shrugged. "No idea. I'm assuming it's one of those see who's coming and play it by ear type of things," I said. "You should come. Hang out with all of us."

Mike made a face. "I don't know about that, Serah..."

"Why not? I'm not sure what's happening but I'm sure it'll be fun." I smiled.

"I dunno. Wouldn't that be kinda... uncomfortable?" Mike said.

"I wouldn't think so. Only if you let it be," I said. "We're all just going as friends, Mike. Just a bunch of coworkers going out and having fun."

"I guess..."

"Plus, my brother wants to meet you." I said.

"He does? Why?" Mike asked.

I shrugged again. "I dunno. He says I've mentioned you a lot and he wants to meet you. Just like he did Nick."

Mike smiled that cute little smirk. "You talk about me to your brother?"

I nodded. "It may be rare but when I make friends I do tell my brothers about them."

Mike smiled. "Alright. I'll come."

"Great," I pulled my phone out of my pocket when it beeped, a message from Jojo. "I've gotta run and grab Jojo and Nate, but I'll text you and let you know where to meet us."

"Alright, sounds like a plan," Mike said, standing up and offering me his hand to help me up. "I'll see you in a while then?"

I nodded. "Mhm, definitely."

Mike grinned, and held out his arms. I wrapped my arms around his waist and gave him a squeeze. He kissed me on the cheek as I pulled away. I wiggled my fingers at him in a wave as I headed away to find my brothers. When I finally found them, Jojo was chatting away with one of the female security guards and Nate was on his phone, looking frustrated. I walked up to Jojo, throwing an arm around his waist and he grinned at me, giving me a squeeze.

"See, I told you she'd be here soon." Jojo said to the security guard.

"I had no doubt you were tellin' the truth sweetheart," She said, laughing. "I just didn't want you to be standing here all by yourself."

"Oh trust me, he can handle himself," I laughed. "Y'all ready to go?"

"Yes ma'am," Jojo nodded. "Nate! Tell your brother to shut up and let's roll!"

Nate was heading toward us as Jojo called him, shaking his head and stuffing his phone back into his pocket. He smiled and hugged me.

"Nice job out there tonight, girl."

"Thanks," I smiled. "So was that Kevin or Kasey? You only look that irritated when you're talking to one of the twins."

Nate was the youngest of five boys in his family. His two oldest brothers, twins Kevin and Kasey, were the ones who still tended to give him a hard time despite the fact that he clearly was no longer the child they envisioned him to be. Nate simply waved it off, rolling his eyes.

"You know how it is. They're just being themselves, as usual." He said. "I'm not even remotely worried about it."

Jojo reached over and looped his arm through Nate's, doing the same with the arm I had around his waist. "Well, then shall we be off? I'm looking forward to whatever it is to come tonight."

* * *

Jojo, Nate, and I stopped at the hotel for a while, relaxing until I heard from Nick again. He called to let me know that the idea for the night was somehow decided upon bowling. There was a local alley that was open for late night bowling.

"I haven't been bowling in years," I laughed. "Who came up with this idea?"

"I wish I could pinpoint that for you, Serah but I have no idea," Nick said. "But I'm just gonna blame it on Matt. Strange ideas are usually his fault."

"Alright, sounds like fun. Wanna send me the address and we'll meet you there?" I said.

"Sounds good. See you soon." Nick said.

Hanging up, I waited the few moments it took for Nick to send along the address. Then I sent the address to Mike before we headed out. The bowling alley was about ten minutes away from the hotel we were staying at. Nick was standing outside with Matt and Cody. I heard Jojo laugh behind me and I elbowed him.

"Well if this isn't an interesting reunion." He said.

"Shut up." I said.

Matt waved as we approached, grinning from ear to ear. "Hey! Lady broski! And... broskis! What's up!"

"Hey there, Iced Z." I smiled.

"Serah." Cody said, a slight frown on his face.

"Hi Cody," I smiled at him. "Matt, Cody, this is my brother Jojo, and his boyfriend Nate. Guys this is Cody Runnels, pretty obvious who he is. And Matt Cardona, Mr. Zack Ryder himself."

Matt shook both their hands. "Nice to meet you guys! I never knew Serah had siblings."

"Serah, I can't believe you don't tell your friends about us." Jojo joked.

"She's a woman of mystery that Serah." Cody said.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Some mysteries take the right person to solve, Cody."

Nick reached out for me, slipping his arm around my waist. He pulled me a little closer to him, leaning down to my ear. "Everything alright?" He asked quietly.

I nodded. "Peachy. Nothing to worry about."

"Well, there's more of us misfits inside," Matt said. "Shall we join them?"

With a chorus of positive answers, we all filed into the building. We headed up to the counter to collect shoes and I peered down the alley to find that we'd taken up at least five lanes in the left corner of the building. Jojo, Nate and I followed Matt, Cody, and Nick to the very end of the room, setting up at the last lane. I sat down to put on my bowling shoes and Nick dropped into the seat next to me.

"So I thought you should know," I said quietly as he leaned down to unlace his shoes. "I invited Mike."

"You did?" Nick asked.

"Mhm. As friends. I felt bad... I had to tell him about the date," I sighed. "I don't like lying to people, Nick."

"I'm sorry. We shouldn't have done that. That was a stupid position for me to put you in." Nick said.

"It's alright. It's water under the bridge now," I said. "But I just thought you should know that he's gonna be here. So be nice, alright?"

Nick laughed, sitting up straight. "Of course I'll be nice! Have some faith in me, girl."

I glanced over to the entrance and saw Mike standing there, looking around. "Just be nice."

Nick just smiled at me and gave my knee a squeeze. I stood up and headed over to Mike, waving to get his attention. He grinned and met me halfway, wrapping me in a hug.

"Hey Serah." He said.

"Hey," I smiled. "You ready for this adventure?"

Mike laughed. "I don't think I've been bowling since I was like seventeen."

"That makes two of us," I said. "Get your shoes! We're all the way down at the end, okay?"

Mike nodded and I headed back towards the table. Jojo was sitting in the seat I was originally in talking to Nick. Nate was at one of the other tables having a very animated conversation with Kofi. I wrapped my arms around my brother's shoulders as I snuck up behind him. Jojo reached his arms back, squeezing me. I dropped a kiss on his cheek and sat down on the open chair at the head of the table.

"What are you boys talking about?" I asked.

"None of your business," Jojo teased, sticking his tongue out at me. "Don't be nosy."

I frowned. "Rude."

"You know it." Jojo laughed.

Nick opened his mouth to speak but stopped short when Mike approached. Mike sat down in the chair opposite Nick.

"Jojo, will you grab Nate? So he can meet Mike." I said.

He nodded and got up. I waited a moment until he was out of direct earshot before speaking to both men.

"Listen guys. I know this is probably weird for both of you to be here tonight," I said quickly. "But I wanted... to extend the olive branch, if you will, between the three of us. I don't want things to be really awkward. I know you both probably feel one way or the other about each other, but... I want you to know that I want us all to be as cool as possible."

"Totally cool on my end," Nick said smoothly. "Don't worry."

"Yeah, definitely cool." Mike said tightly.

I sighed, not really believing either of them. "Are you guys sure?"

"Yeah, we're sure." They said together.

Nick and Mike shared a strained look and I sighed. Jojo and Nate came back to the table, taking the empty seats.

"Well there's a new face. You must be Mike," Jojo said and stuck his hand out to him. "I'm Jojo, nice to finally meet you."

Mike shook his hand, smiling. "Yeah, nice to meet you, too."

Nate shook Mike's hand as well. "I'm Nate, nice to meet ya. We've heard a bit about you from Serah."

Mike smiled. "Good things, I hope."

Nate nodded, perching on the side of the table between me and Jojo. "Of course. Serah's a good girl, she wouldn't bad talk anyone unless they deserved it."

He looked back at me and smiled, laughing. The conversation at our table started off a bit awkward, but as time progressed and the rest of our group showed up, the awkwardness eased away. John showed up, dragging Randy - who my brother had always wanted to meet - along, as well as Stephen. John and Randy joined our table, while Stephen went to join Kofi and Matt after hellos and introductions. Finally we started bowling and it was a spectacle to say the very least. None of us were really any good but we had a blast nonetheless. At one point, Kofi "accidentally" bowled his ball down our lane when it was Nick's turn, earning him a gutter ball. Nick retaliated, running over when it was Kofi's turn and, using Phil - who sat at their table - as a distraction, threw the ball granny style directly down the side for the longest gutter ball ever.

At one point, Nate and Mike were standing at a table near the concession stand talking close together. Curious, I walked over discreetly but Nate happened to look up as I was heading their way. I smiled at him and walked over to him.

"Gonna get something from concessions. You want something?" I said.

"Nah, I'm good. Thanks though." Nate said.

"Mike?"

He shook his head. "No thanks."

I smiled at them both and headed away, walking over to the concession stand. Cody was standing in front of me getting a drink and stared me down as he walked away. Sighing, I got an order of french fries I wasn't really going to eat, a drink and headed back to the table. I dropped down into my seat and Nick looked over at me.

"Hungry?" I asked, pushing the paper container of french fries to the center of the table.

Nick shook his head. "Nah, not really."

"Me either," I laughed and nudged my brother's arm. "There's fries, if you want them."

"You're not gonna?" Jojo asked.

"Nope," I said, shrugging. "Plus, it's my turn up anyway."

* * *

We bowled until the manager of the alley told us that it was closing time and we all needed to leave. By the time it was all over, my right arm was sore from throwing the ball but we all had a great time. I headed up to the counter to return my shoes and pay.

Smiling at the clerk who look clearly annoyed that a rowdy group of wrestlers was keeping her late, I sat my shoes on the counter. "How much do I owe you?"

"Name you bowled under?" She asked.

"Dahlia."

She glanced over at the computer and shrugged. "Lane one? You guys are good to go. The Real World guy paid for the whole table."

I chuckled at her description of Mike. "Oh, well thanks. And sorry about the delay."

She shrugged again but the less than pleasant look on her face spoke volumes. I walked back to the table where Mike was standing, talking to Jojo and wrapped and arm around his waist, giving him a quick squeeze.

"Thanks, superstar." I said.

"Huh, what for?" Mike asked, throwing an arm around my shoulders.

"For paying," I said. "The girl at the counter said the 'real world' guy paid. That was really sweet of you."

Mike shook his head. "I'm never gonna shake that, am I?"

I laughed. "I doubt it. Hey, embrace it! Helped you get here, didn't it?"

He laughed. "Very, very true."

I pulled out of Mike's grip, threading my arm through my brother's as we headed to the door. "Did you have fun with all us wrestling misfits?"

"Y'all sure do know how to show visitors a good time," He smiled. "It was great! But you know I'm ready to party! Where are we going next?"

I laughed. "Whoa there, party monster! I'm a beat up old lady now, it's way past my bed time."

"Oh stop it," Jojo said, pinching my side. "I know you can party!"

"We'll see." I winked.

As soon as the last of us were out the door, the manager, giving us a tight, forced smile, locked it faster than we could blink. Most of the group were hanging around in the parking lot near their respective cars, laughing loudly and joking around. I pulled Jojo along, joining Nate and Nick who were standing with Cody, John, Randy and Stephen. John, who was in the best mood I'd seen him in for quite some time, walked up to me. I smiled at him and threaded my free arm through his.

"What's up, Superman?" I said.

John shrugged. "Chillin, ya know. It was nice to get out and do something over than work for once."

I smiled and Jojo pulled away from me, going to Nate's side. "Well you can thank Nick for that. I wouldn't have known if it wasn't for him."

"Fair enough," John grinned. "So are you still..."

"Excuse me, you are _so_ rude!"

I looked past John to Jojo who was glaring at Cody, his hands perched on his hips. Nate rested a hand on his elbow but Jojo shrugged it off, turning to face Cody full.

"If you're going to try and talk shit about my sister then please, make sure I'm not standing right beside you," Jojo snapped, pointing a finger in Cody's face. "You are nasty and rude and how dare you open your mouth about her. Just because you obviously weren't doing enough to keep a girl interested doesn't mean you have the right to slander her when you're standing right next to her older brother. Please get the hell out of my face. So rude."

Most of the group seemed to be shocked into silence. I noticed Nick's shoulders shaking with silent laughter. Nate was shaking his head, used to this type of display from his boyfriend. Mike was covering an obvious smile with his hand. I laughed, swatting at John when he nudged me for doing so. That was my brother, and he would protect me to the end of the Earth, whether it was a small situation or a big one. Jojo would always be there for me.


	10. Chapter 10

My phone woke me up the following morning, ringing loudly on the table beside my head. Sleepily, I reached over and grabbed it, squinting one eye at the display. I slid my finger across the screen, pressing the phone to my ear.

"Good morning, Nick." I said, yawning.

"Aw, did I wake you up?" He laughed.

"Mhm, yes you did," I said. "What can I do for you, sir?"

"Well, I thought maybe, since we've got plenty of time today, you'd wanna come have a morning pajama party with me," Nick said. "I'll even treat for the room service."

"Oh really? Well it's a good thing you caught me while I was still...mostly wearing my pajamas." I laughed.

"Excellent, I'm in room 310. See you in a few?" Nick said.

"Definitely. I'll be there shortly." I said.

I hung up with Nick and let out another huge yawn. Pushing the covers back, hopped out of bed and headed to the bathroom to freshen up a bit before going to see Nick. Then, I grabbed a pair of soft purple lounge pants out of my suitcase, sliding them on. I threw a white t-shirt on over my bra and grabbed my phone and room key and was out the door. Nick's room was a floor below mine and down the hall from where Jojo and Nate were. I glanced at their door on by and noticed the 'Do Not Disturb' tag hanging from the handle, giggled, and kept walking. I knocked on Nick's door and he opened it after a short second, smiling at me. I smiled back as he let me inside and shut the door behind me.

"Nice pajamas." I said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Nick had on the most impossibly low-slung pajama bottoms I'd ever seen. The thin red cotton bottoms sat just so on his hips that deep v-cut of muscle leading down from his hips was blatantly visible. He was shirtless and his hair was a white blonde puff pushed to the back of his head with a band. He looked so damn good I almost didn't notice the spread of food he'd already ordered.

"Same to ya," He grinned. "Get comfortable. I hope you like pancakes."

I laughed, and got up, sitting the pillows in a more comfortable position against the headboard, crawling onto the bed. Nick handed me a plate that had pancakes, eggs, sausage and pineapples and mangos on it, and passed me a cup of orange juice before settling in beside me.

"First of all, I don't know anyone who doesn't like pancakes," I said, balancing my plate on my thighs and setting my cup on the bedside table. "Second of all, I hope you weren't planning on eating this all yourself if I couldn't have come."

Nick laughed. "Well I'm glad I won't have to find out."

We ate our breakfast with quiet conversation and when we were done, Nick got up and collected our dishes, placing them neatly back onto the cart. He climbed back into the bed, putting his arm around me and I rested my head against his shoulder.

"So, tell me something interesting about yourself, Serah." Nick said.

I thought for a moment before answering. "Well, I grew up in Texas and we had a lot of land. So we had this huge house and a barn in the back. We also had a small horse stable. So Jojo and I both had horses as kids. I think one of my fondest memories of growing up in that place was when I was really young and I rode horses around the wood trail behind our house with my Dad."

"That's sweet," Nick said and kissed the top of my head. "I can totally picture you as a cute little cowgirl."

I shook my head. "Don't. It didn't last long. When I was about eleven or twelve I started getting into sports. I played soccer and basketball. Then field hockey when I got to high school. I was a cheerleader for a while but I actually hated it, so I took up gymnastics."

"Hm, me too, minus the gymnastics. What are the odds." Nick joked. "I bet you were a hot cheerleader."

"I _know_ you were a hot cheerleader," I laughed. "I saw a lot of that Spirit Squad business."

"Touché," Nick laughed. "What made you wanna get into wrestling?"

"It's something I was always interested in. Jojo and I used to watch it together all the time," I said, smiling fondly. "It was one of the many brother-sister bonding things we did as kids. We'd huddle up around the TV on Monday nights and beg our parents to let us get the pay-per-view stuff. We used to wrestle around the house all the time. I always told Jojo that's what I wanted to do. That I was gonna be there one day and he always believed in me. Our parents weren't so supportive of the idea. They didn't think it was 'right' for a lady. Whatever. Here I am today and I wouldn't change it for the world."

"What other kinda stuff did you do as a kid?" Nick asked.

"You've got a lot of questions this morning, Nicholas." I laughed, glancing sideways at him.

"I'm just trying to get to know you better," Nick said. Burying his face in my hair, he said in my ear: "I told you I like to chase, and I'm trying to solve a little of the mystery that is you."

My heart fluttered. "Lucky you. You may just be the one to be able to do that."

"I'm honored," He said, kissing my cheek through my hair. "And I fully expect you to grill me right back so I'm prepared to take what I'm dishing out."

"Fair enough," I smiled. "So as far as things I did as a kid... hmm. I guess I did a lot of stuff that most girls do. I had what, in retrospect, I feel was a really creepy doll collection. My Mother and Grandmother used to buy them for me as presents when I was growing up. I'd get one for Christmas, one for my birthday, and one for Easter. I tried Girl Scouts for a year or two but didn't really like it. Ya know, I was a pretty normal child. But as I got older and my interests changed and my ideals started to form from experiences and things I saw, I changed along with them. I grew out of a lot of the things my parents told me to believe in as I started seeing things for myself. I'm sure it's a pretty normal thing that most kids do but I guess my folks took it kinda hard."

"I don't doubt it. Parents usually get kinda crazy when their kids start growing up and growing out of lots of the things they taught them growing up,"

Nick shifted, scooting down so that he was laying on his back and pulled me down with him. I turned to my side, resting my head in the bend of his elbow so I could still look at him.

"Since I've had my turn, now its yours. Question away, my dear." He said.

"Well, what was it like for you growing up? What kind of kid was little Nick?" I asked.

He laughed. "I was a pretty typical boy, I guess. I grew up in Ohio and just did a lot of running around outside and getting into trouble with my brother. I've been into wrestling since I was like five or so. But make no mistake about it. I'm kind of a nerd."

I giggled. "Somehow I'm having a hard time believing that."

"No, really. I was a mathlete, along with being an athlete. I speak, if you will, fluent American Sign Language," Nick said, and had lifted his arms, signing the entire time he spoke. "But at the same time, I was an amateur wrestler from the time I was in high school and then all the way through college. It's just something I always did, always loved."

"So what were you doing before you came to WWE?" I asked.

"Getting ready to go to law school. I had a degree in political science already and had done pre-law at Kent State. I was living in Phoenix, and getting ready to start law school at Arizona State when I had my tryout. So obviously that worked out and I kissed a law degree goodbye to do what I really wanted to. Amateur, professional, whatever it was. Wrestling was just _in_ me. It's really the only thing I've ever wanted to do."

"Wow, how upset were your parents at you for ducking out of law school?" I said.

"I'm pretty sure they're still mad about it," Nick laughed. "But they understand at this point. I mean it's not like I can turn back now. I'm kinda on a roll with this wrestling thing."

I smiled at him, yawning and resting my head against his chest. Nick wrapped an arm around my shoulders, squeezing me against him. "I like this. These talks."

"Me too," Nick said, kissing the top of my head. "I like getting to know you, Serah."

"Can I ask you something, Nick?" I said.

"Fire away. It's your turn to ask the questions anyway." He said.

"A while back, you said that it wasn't the right time for us to have sex," I said. "What did you mean by that?"

Nick chuckled. "I wanted us to have the right type of relationship first. Even if we didn't want a romantic relationship. I liked you from the start, Serah, I'm not going to deny that. So I didn't want it to just be a fuck and run. I wanted us to have some kind of substance first. Friends, friends with benefits, whatever we ended up being, I wanted there to be something. I didn't want to just know you for a couple weeks or month and just jump into bed immediately. I wanted to get to know you, I _still_ want to get to know you."

I lifted my head to him, smiling. "So, have we reached that point yet?"

"I'd say so," Nick grinned knowingly but played along. "Why do you ask?"

I shifted, pushing myself up and throwing a leg across Nick's hips. I leaned down and kissed him hard. "You know damn well why."

* * *

Nick tossed the comforter to the floor, hovering over me. He laid his forehead against my bent knee, pressing his lips to the front of my knee, grazing his teeth there. I groaned, Nick was an observant lover, finding many of my most sensitive spots with only the nonsense sounds he drew from me to go by. He wasted no time exploiting them in the most delicious way that left me a moaning, panting mess but wanting him more and more. Nick had teased and tasted, kissed, licked, and nipped almost every inch of my skin and I was putty in his hands. I reached out to grab his arms, intent on pulling him down to me but he captured my wrists and with a quick tug had me up off my back and into his arms. I grabbed two fistfuls of his hair and pulled his face down to mine, crushing our lips together. Our mouths battled, tongues danced and before I knew it, Nick's arms were around my waist, lifting me up with all that strength.

Then he was inside me and I could have cried it felt so good. I tossed my head back, moaning without shame. Instinct wound my legs around Nick's hips as I felt him thrust up into me. He nuzzled his face into the side of my neck, leaving tiny bite trails up my neck to my jaw. I dug my nails into his back, trails of bright red along the soft, smooth white of his shoulders. Nick wasn't gentle with me and I didn't want him to be. His thrusts were fast, rough, and deep, straight to the core of me, his hands vice tight on my hips. Sweat matted my hair to my cheeks and forehead, slicked my and Nick's skin as we moved together.

He locked his arms around my waist, and I hitched my legs a little higher around his hips as he moved forward and dropped me on my back again, never missing a beat. Nick leaned down to me, brushing his lips against my chin and jaw, seeking my lips. I kissed him, biting his bottom lip and a sharp moan came out of him. I licked his lip where I'd bitten him, smiling against his mouth. I wiggled my hips, rocking us side to side until Nick got the hint. He rolled, keeping himself firmly sheathed inside me until he was on his back. I ground my hips down against his and my name rolled out his lips behind a pleasured grunt. Nick took hold of my hips again, his thrusts just as deep and hard as before but his pace had slowed slightly, letting the build of pleasure become a slow burn, a fire igniting between us, keeping me as close to the edge for as long as he could. I felt myself coming undone, my body burning, aching for release.

And Nick gave it to me. His last few thrusts sending me careening over the edge with nowhere to go but up. I cried out his name, every muscle in my body clenching hard, pulling, dragging Nick with me. I'd braced my hands against his shoulders, my nails digging little red crescents into his skin. His hands were a bruising force on my hips when he came, holding me tight, groaning out my name against my skin as I'd collapsed on top of him, riding high on the last hiccups of my orgasm.

Neither of us moved for a few long moments. Finally, I managed it, rolling to my side as Nick slowly pulled himself out of me. I kissed the corner of his mouth before settling myself on my back.

"I'm glad we waited," I said, pushing sweaty hair off my forehead. "That was incredible."

Nick made a noise, cleared his throat then tried again. "Yeah, I agree. Goddammit Serah you're an amazing woman."

I smiled, turned my head and kissed his shoulder. "I definitely think I don't wanna leave you for a while."

"So don't," Nick turned to his side, propping himself up on his elbow for a moment to look at the clock. "We've got time. Stay with me."

I nodded and Nick pulled me against him, kissing me. When we broke away, Nick rolled onto his back again and I rested my head on his shoulder. He put an arm around me and I threw one of my arms over his stomach, shifting around to get comfortable. I drifted off after a few minutes and didn't wake up until I heard my phone ringing from the bedside table almost two hours later. I ignored it, yawning against Nick's chest and tried to fall back into the lull of sleep. I'd just barely fallen asleep when my phone started to ring again. I groaned and Nick grunted in his sleep, turning towards me without waking up. I reached back, grabbing my phone and squinting at the display.

"What?" I muttered by way of a greeting.

"Oh you're so friendly in the morning." Jojo teased. "Where are you? I've been knocking on your door for ten minutes, bitch."

"I'm with Nick, jerk," I said. "What's going on?"

"_Oh_, well nevermind! Nate and I were going to see if you wanted to come have a late breakfast with us." Jojo said.

"Sorry, I already ate." I yawned.

"I bet you did," Jojo laughed. "Well, that's fine. We'll go exploring. How about dinner?"

"Shut up," I said, but laughed anyway. "And yeah, dinner sounds good. Let me know when you guys get back to the hotel. You're still coming to the show tonight, right?"

"Absolutely. Wouldn't miss it for the world. We'll see you in a little while baby." Jojo said.

"Alright. See you later."

I hung up, dropping my phone back onto the table beside the bed. Nick was awake when I turned over again, smiling sleepily at me.

"Your brother?" He asked.

"Mhm." I yawned. "They were going to get a late breakfast and were asking if I wanted to come with."

Nick chuckled. "Oops, I guess we sort of put a damper on their plans."

I shrugged. "Yeah, but they're going to explore so I'm sure they'll be fine," I pushed myself upright. "I think I should grab a shower... but I have no other clothes to wear."

"I'll give you something to wear just to go back to your room if you want," Nick said, sitting up with me and pressing a kiss to the back of my shoulder. "Can I join you?"

I turned to face him, kissing him. "Of course you can."

After showering, Nick had lent me a pair of his boxers (that I rolled up around my waist a few times) and a t-shirt so I could head back to my room. He kissed me at the door and I promised to see him after dinner with my brothers. Back in my room, I dried my hair and changed into lace tight with a pair of black shorts over them, a black cami and a dark gray blazer that had bands of purple around the bottom of the sleeves. I finished off the look with some jewelry and sparkly purple pumps. I'd just finished putting on my makeup when someone knocked on the door.

"She better be back by now." I heard my brother complain on the other side of the door.

"Keep your pants on, babe." Nate laughed.

I snickered to myself, opening the door. Jojo grinned at me as I waved the two of them in. Nate patted the top of my head as he walked by, settling into the desk chair. Jojo hugged me before sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Now, I'm a little confused," Nate said, staring, eyebrows raised at the shirt and boxers on the bed. "Should I ask where those came from?"

I grabbed the clothes off the bed, shoving them into my suitcase. "They belong to Nick."

"Oh." Nate said, smiling knowingly at me.

"Serah! Did you? With Nick? _Finally_?!" Jojo said. "Um, and not on this bed, right? Cos if you did and didn't tell me and I'm sitting in his lost children, we're gonna have problems."

"Jojo shut up!" I laughed. "No, not in this bed, and yes, we finally did. And it was definitely worth the wait."

"Girl, I bet he turned your world upside down and inside out and back again," Jojo said. "He's been waiting for that."

"Excuse me?" I said, turning sharply to look at him.

"Mhm, he has. We talked," Jojo said. "It's not like he went into any kind of detail or anything but I know how to read between the lines. He's a smart guy, he wouldn't outright say it to your big brother's face. Not like that idiot Cody."

I rolled my eyes. "So you guys talked to both Nick and Mike, right? What did you think?"

"We'll talk about it later. Over dinner tonight," Jojo said. "Don't you have to go get ready for the show tonight?"

"We've got a lot to talk about, that's for sure." Nate said.

I glanced over at him, but he only smiled and winked at me. Something about that made me a little nervous. But no matter how many times I asked to talk about it sooner, they shot me down. It was going to be a long night.


	11. Chapter 11

I ended up not having a match that night at the house show. I stayed around to watch Nick's match but after he finished, I waited to get Jojo and Nate and we headed out from the arena. We headed back to the hotel and decided to order from a nearby Chinese restaurant that would deliver to the hotel. While we waited for the food to be delivered, I headed up to my room to change into some more comfortable clothes.

I couldn't help but smile when I walked back into Jojo and Nate's room. They'd taken the extra comforter from out of the closet and laid it down on the floor like a picnic blanket, the comforter from the bed was laid out on top of it. Jojo was sitting, his back leaning against the bed, changing channels on the television. I dropped down next to him, pulling the comforter from the bed up over my and Jojo's legs.

"Where's Nate?" I asked.

"He went to get the food," Jojo said. "He should be back in a minute."

"I've been thinking about this all day, ya know," I said, giving his shoulder a playful shove. "You guys just left me hanging about this and I've had my guts all twisted up about it."

"Why, Serah?" Jojo laughed. "You're nervous? What are you so afraid of?"

I shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know."

"I think you do and you're not telling me." Jojo said.

"Why wouldn't I tell you?" I asked, frowning at him.

"Because you don't like it," Jojo said. "You're my baby sister, Serah, I know you. There's something going on inside that head of yours that you don't like and you don't want to face. So you're not trying to talk about it. "

I sighed, but didn't get the chance to respond. The door opened and Nate walked in with our food. For the moment, I was relieved. I didn't want to start the night off with talking about _my_ feelings when the two of them were supposed to be talking about how _they_ felt about Nick and Mike. We spent a few minutes sorting through the cardboard containers and dishing out food onto plates and another few minutes laughing when Nate accidentally snapped off the top of his chopstick trying to break them apart and sent it flying across the room. Finally, we were all huddled under the blanket to eat, the television turned off, waiting for one of us to bring up the subject that gathered us. I poked at my food with my chopsticks, nerves stealing my appetite.

"Well I suppose one of us has to address the elephant in the room," Nate said. "Since our little Serah looks scared out of her wits."

Jojo chuckled. "She's uncomfortable as hell right now."

I rolled my eyes at both of them, resting my plate on the floor beside me. "You guys left me on a cliffhanger all day long and I've been sweating it a little."

"I don't know why," Nate said calmly. "It's just our opinions. You're gonna do whatever is in your heart, Serah."

"I know," I said softly. "But your opinions are really important to me."

"Well then let's get right down to this," Jojo said. "So we've talked to Mike and Nick, individually and there's a little... discord if you will. Differing opinions."

"Like what?" I asked.

"I like Mike," Nate said plainly. "He's an interesting dude to talk to. He really seems to like you a lot and what he wants to do is get to know you. He respects you and I think that's really important in a budding relationship. He's a nice guy and Nick just seems too cocky to me. And not in that way that's _just_ a little more confident. I don't _dislike_ him but I think I like Mike a little more."

"And see, I feel the opposite way for the same reasons, essentially. I like Nick, I really like him a lot. He's a nicer guy than I thought he would be. He _gushed_ about you when we talked," Jojo said. "And not in a lame kind of way, but a way that's just really sweet. Mike seems really... competitive to get to you. He's got a lotta mouth."

"So what's wrong with being a little aggressive when it comes to trying to be with someone you're interested in," Nate asked. "At least he's willing to put in the effort and not just sitting around and hoping for things to come to him."

"But Serah doesn't _like_ it when boys are too aggressive," Jojo said. "Which is why Nick is good for her. He's not pushy, he's not being a wimp about how he feels about her, and he's not just having sex with her for fun. He waited until there was really something strong between them and I respect him for that."

"Alright, I'll give you that one," Nate drawled. "Mike might have jumped the gun with that, but it takes two to make that magic happen."

"True," Jojo admitted. "You have a point. But I think we also need to factor in the fact that Serah is more into Nick than I've seen her into a guy in a very long time."

"So does that mean you're not into Mike?" Nate asked.

"Not the same way I am Nick," I admitted softly. "I like Mike as a friend, and I mean he's a really good friend. There's just something about Nick and I don't really understand it. I feel a different type of connection with Nick than I do with Mike."

"I'm not saying that either of us know these guys very well when we've talked to them maybe twice in so many days," Nate said. "Obviously you know them better than we do, we're just gonna give you our honest opinions. I think you've got two pretty decent choices depending on what you're looking for."

"I don't know what I'm looking for, really," I said, sighing. "I'm afraid of getting into a relationship again at this point. It's not like I want to get married and have kids or anything so I'm not waiting on my 'biological clock' or something. It's not one of those cases of I'm not getting any younger."

"Do you think either of them feel like they're in that position?" Jojo asked.

I shrugged. "It's never really something I've talked to either of them about. Never really been concerned with it."

"So just, hypothetically speaking," Jojo started. "What if you were to get into a relationship of some sort with one of these guys and that comes up?"

"I don't know. I know that's probably one of those deal breaker things for a relationship at this age. But if that's something they want then... I just don't know," I said, raking my fingers through my hair. "I don't want that."

"Not even a compromise?" Nate asked.

I shrugged. "I have no idea. It would already take someone really special just to even make me want to be in a serious relationship. That person would have to be triple special to make me take a step that far."

"We know that, Serah," Nate said. "We're just trying to see where your head is at with this situation. We also know that it's a big part of your life that you don't deal with more than one man at a time and that this situation is causing you a lot of grief. It's coming down to the time for you to make a decision."

"It's been time for me to make a decision," I sighed. "Especially now... after this morning with Nick. There's no way I can carry that around. It's gotta be one or the other and I already know Mike is going to be upset about it but..."

"But I think your heart is with Nick, sweetie," Jojo said. "Maybe you should give it a try. I know you're afraid and I know things that have happened in the past weigh heavy on you but you can't let that hinder now."

I shook my head. "I don't know guys. I'm afraid to tell Nick about things that I've done. I'm not some innocent little princess. I'm afraid to tell him about what's happened. That it'll push him away and he won't want anything to do with me anymore. I'm scared to get into this but I don't want to lose him. Nick is such an amazing guy and... despite myself I really think I've grown to care about him. I just don't want to ruin it."

"Let's be blunt about this, because I know you can handle it," Nate said, resting his hand on my knee. "If he can't accept you for your past, present, and future, he isn't good enough for you. If he can't support you and understand and be patient with you and the reservations you have then he isn't good enough for you. If he can do those things, then you've got a real catch on your hands and should hold onto it."

"He couldn't be more correct," Jojo said. "If you think Nick could be that person, there's no reason you shouldn't just try and explore it."

"We'll see what happens, I guess," I said, sighing.

"Serah, don't deprive yourself of the chance for something that could make you really happy," Nate said. "I know that you're doing a lot of great things and you don't need a man to make you truly happy but I think, even if I may prefer the other guy a little, that Nick could be a good person for you. If he's good to you and patient and loving, that's what matters."

"And if he's not, I'll knock him on his ass," Jojo said, smiling but all seriousness behind his words. "No one hurts my Serah."

"No, but what happens if your Serah hurts someone else, again?" I said, frowning.

"That _isn't_ going to happen again. You've got to start letting that go, Serah Dahlia," Jojo said firmly. "I know you've done things you aren't proud of but you're not stupid. To repeat that mistake again would be foolish and that's something you aren't. You've grown up from there, girl."

I leaned my head on Jojo's shoulder and he wrapped and arm around me, kissing my forehead. Nate crawled over to us, sandwiching me between the two of them and kissed me on the cheek. I wrapped an arm around each of their waists and squeezed them both tightly. I'd truly be lost without the two of them. Their help, opinions, and guidance were invaluable to me, and everything they'd said about the situation I was in couldn't be more true. It'd been far too long that I'd trusted myself with being in a relationship, but maybe, if I were lucky, Nick could be that person to make the change, to restore my confidence in having a partner in this life.


	12. Chapter 12

Two days after our picnic chat, John and I dropped Nate and Jojo off at the airport in Albuquerque, New Mexico. I shed a few sad tears in the car on the way back to the hotel. John walked me back to my room, offering to stay for a bit but I told him I'd be fine and would talk to him later. In reality, at the same time that I was sad about my brothers leaving, I was mentally going over the conversation we'd had about my romantic situation before they left. I felt the need to come clean to Mike, to tell him how I was really feeling about the state of our relationship, even though I wasn't looking forward to the conversation. It just after noon on Thursday and I knew Mike would be finishing up a media morning soon. I sent him a text asking if he could stop by my room when he got back and he replied almost half an hour later saying he'd just got back to the hotel and was on his way up.

I felt nervous. Like I was throwing myself to the wolves. I nearly jumped out of my skin when Mike knocked on the door. My heart was thudding against my chest and I took several deep breaths to try and calm myself before opening the door. Mike was grinning at me as I invited him in, looking stylish in his black suit and light green tie. I sat on the edge of the bed and Mike sat next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders. I felt stiff, my heart still hammering. I gently pulled out of his grip and paced the length of the floor a few times.

"Are you alright, Serah?" He asked. "You're acting kinda weird."

"I'm a little nervous, actually," I admitted. "I... I need to tell you something and I don't think you're going to like it, but I promised you that I was going to be honest with you going forward. So that's what I'm doing."

"Okay... you're kinda worrying me here. What's going on." Mike said.

"We can't... we do what we've been doing anymore. I can't have that kind of relationship with you anymore," I said quickly. "I can't have sex with you anymore. I can't go on dates with you anymore. We can't do it."

"Why not?" Mike asked, frowning.

"I can't do this anymore. I can't go back and forth between you and Nick," I admitted, running my fingers through my hair. "It should have stopped a long time ago, but I didn't know what I wanted. I still don't think I'm totally sure what I want. But I know I can't keep this up. I feel like I'm doing something wrong."

"So are you with him, then?" Mike said sourly.

"No, I'm not," I said, facing him. "But I might want to be. I don't know."

"So why are you doing this now?"

"Because I had sex with him." I said softly, turning my back again.

I heard the bed squeak when Mike stood, but didn't sense him come any closer. He was silent and I couldn't bring myself to look back at him to attempt to gauge his reaction. Finally, after a long stretch, he spoke.

"So you're splitting on me because you fucked him? What the hell is so special about Nick?" Mike asked angrily.

"I'm not _splitting_ on you, Mike!" I said, spinning around. "I want to be your friend. I don't want us to stop talking entirely. I just can't do those intimate things with you anymore."

"You didn't answer my question," Mike said. "What the hell is so special about this guy?"

"_I don't know_!" I said. "I... I just _feel_ this _thing_ with him. It's not the same with you, Mike. I'm not trying to say these things to hurt you I'm just trying to be honest and tell you how I feel. It's not that I don't want anything to do with you anymore, because that's not true. I want to continue to be friends with you and to hang out with you. I don't want to keep sleeping with you and I don't want to do things with you that can be misconstrued..."

"But you'll do them with Nick." Mike spat.

"_I don't know_! Shit, Mike, what do you want from me?!" I cried, clenching my fists. "I don't understand what's going on any better than you do...!"

"That's bullshit, Serah! I'm sick of that excuse of yours!" Mike yelled.

"It's not a goddamn excuse! How many times do I have to tell you that this is new for me?! I don't go jumping head first into serious relationships if I can fucking help it," I yelled back, throwing my hands up. "This isn't something I planned! I didn't _want_ to have feelings for Nick. I didn't just wake up one day and decide to feel this way! I'm fucking sorry that this didn't work out in your favor but I will _not_ apologize for my feelings. I've spent long enough trying to deny them and pretend they aren't there or don't exist. I can't do that to myself anymore. It's not fair to me. So I'm sorry if I've hurt your precious fucking ego by telling you the truth when that's what you asked of me..."

"Don't spin this around at me! How did you expect me to react? When the girl I've got feelings for comes to me and says she's got feelings for some other guy. Conveniently after she slept with him. That's not a fucking easy blow!"

"That's not the way it happened and you know it, Mike!" I said, gritting my teeth, tears stinging my eyes. "I didn't just develop these feelings for him after I slept with him. They were there, and you know it because I told you about it before. So don't try and make me look like some cheap fucking whore who only catches feelings for the guy she slept with. Because if that happened then I'd have had feelings for a lot of other guys and that _definitely_ hasn't happened."

"So what do you want me to do? You want me to pretend like I don't feel anything for you and let you just go around frolicking with Nick? You want me to pretend I didn't wish that was me? To just be your friend and watch you get with some other guy? Is that what you want, Serah?"

"No! Yes! Fuck, I don't know! Right now I want you to _back off_," I snapped, stomping over to the window. "This was such a fucking mistake. All I wanted to do was be up front with you and it turns into this fucking screaming match. All I want is for you to understand that I have feelings for him and I don't know exactly what's going to happen there. I want you to be a fucking _friend_. I should have known this shit was impossible."

"What do you mean by that?" Mike said.

"Exactly what it sounds like! It's impossible to maintain a friendship after this shit happens," I said. "Especially when someone else's feelings are involved. If you dislike it that much then walk away now, Mike. Just go. I won't have you making me feel bad for the things that I feel and I won't be here parading whatever happens between Nick and I in your face..."

"It's not like I can avoid it. We do kinda work together." Mike muttered.

"Then don't pay attention to me! Or Nick! Just fucking forget me or something," I yelled. "I'm not trying to hurt anybody. I'm not and it's not working. I don't know how to make this any better. If you don't want to continue to be friends without all of the extra stuff we had then fine and goodbye. I'm sorry to lose a good friend. But if you think we can try and put all that aside and work on just having a friendship, I'd like that a lot."

Mike shook his head, sighing heavily. "I guess we'll see. You're a good friend, Serah but this is a real shitty situation."

"You think I don't understand that? This isn't what I wanted to happen. I didn't want it to get to this point. I just wanted to have fun, not get attached to someone." I said.

"Well sometimes that happens," Mike snapped. "And you can't help how you feel about someone."

"I _know_! So don't play that card with me and turn around and give me shit for how I feel about Nick," I said sharply. "Don't be a fucking hypocrite."

"Is there actually anything going on between the two of you?" Mike asked.

"No, there isn't," I said. "I haven't even told him how I feel yet."

"So why are you putting the nail in our coffin already? What if he doesn't want to be with you?" Mike said.

"I don't know," I said softly. "But it doesn't mean I'll turn around and want to be with you. That's not how it works."

"Well I want to be with you, Serah. That's how I feel right now, since we're all being honest about our feelings," Mike said. "And if there's nothing really happening with you and Nick, I don't see why you're pushing me out of the picture..."

"You can't be serious." I said.

"I'm not done fighting for this yet," Mike said adamantly. "I'm not letting him take you that easily."

"Goddammit Mike don't do this." I said shaking my head.

"You haven't given me much of a choice. I'm not going to just give you up without a fight."

"I'm not a fucking trophy." I snapped. "And this isn't a game!"

"I'm not the one playing games, Serah," Mike said, heading for the door. "You can't help the things you feel and the people you feel them for. And you can't just let it go if you really believe they deserve better than what they're going for. I'm better for you than Nick, I know it."

I opened my mouth to reply but Mike was out the door before I could get a word out. I watched the door slam shut behind him and dropped down onto the bed, resting my head in my hands. What a mess this turned out to be.

* * *

Avoiding someone on the road in this profession was almost impossible when you didn't have a group of people to blend into. A few days after my disastrous conversation with Mike, I was having trouble shaking him and his pointed glances at me everywhere I went. John kept vowing to break his legs if he caused me anymore trouble and Nick was doing his best to keep me smiling even though he had no clue why Mike was acting the way he was.

After the encounter with Mike had gone downhill, I was having trouble summoning up the courage to confess my feelings to Nick. Every night I talked to Jojo, he told me 'just do it, Serah-bear, don't be afraid' but I still hesitated. I didn't think I could handle another blow up so close to each other. But that was just me being afraid and jumping to conclusions, something else my brother wouldn't hesitate to tell me.

Two weeks later, I'd decided I waited long enough and couldn't take the stress of it anymore. Nick and I had planned to go to dinner after RAW that Monday night and I'd psyched myself up to talk to him later that night. We had a causal dinner after the show and were going to drive to the next city together. We were in St. Louis for RAW and had a four hour drive to Kansas City for a live event the next day. The first few hours of the drive were quiet, the radio playing in the background and sparse conversation between us. We stopped at a McDonald's a little more than halfway through the trip for a bathroom break and I was relieved when Nick volunteered to take up driving again. I was far too nervous to concentrate on the road and this conversation at the same time.

"Hey, Nick, can we talk about something?" I said cautiously.

"Of course. We got nothing but time at this point." He said, smiling over at me.

"Well... I've got a bit of a confession to make," I said, wringing my hands. "You know how we've been talking about things that are going on between us lately?"

"Yeah," Nick said. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I've really been thinking. I mean thinking about this for a long time. So this isn't something sudden or that's occurred because of things that have gone down between us," I said, biting my bottom lip. "Nick... I really... I have feelings for you. And this is hard and strange and scary for me. But I've decided... after a lot of thinking and talking with the people closest to me that I can't be afraid of something that could be good for me. I can't be afraid of my feelings because of things that have happened in the past. I've been denying this to myself for a while, and I just can't do it anymore. It's stupid and it's causing me a lot of stress to keep it to myself."

"So is that why Mike's been trying to burn my eyes out with his mind every time he sees me?" Nick asked playfully.

"Probably," I sighed. "I told him that I can't do the things I used to with him. I told him I still wanted to be friends but... I really care about you. And I don't know what's going to happen between us but I can't just let it hover in the air between us anymore. I don't know exactly what you're feeling but I had to tell you how I feel."

We pulled up to a red light and Nick looked over at me. He grinned and leaned over the seat, kissing me on the cheek. "Serah, I like you a lot. I really do. I'm glad that you told me this. Cos I really didn't know how much longer I could go on chasing you without knowing how you felt. I wasn't going to push you into something you didn't want to be a part of. I wasn't trying to make you want to be with me if you really didn't want to. I didn't want to scare you off with telling you how much I really cared. In retrospect that's probably kinda dumb, but I wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable. That's one of the reasons why I didn't just jump right into bed with you. I didn't want you to think that was the only reason I wanted to be around you."

"So you... you feel the same way I do? Really?" I said. "I thought you didn't want to be in a relationship."

"When we first really met, I didn't and I understood the things you said about relationships and stuff," Nick said as we pulled off from the light. "But as I got to know you and talk to you, I could see myself being with you. But again, I didn't want to scare you off. I didn't wanna rush you about anything cos what kind of jerk would I be for that, ya know? But I was willing to wait, and chase, and see what happened."

"Now, let me be honest with you. I haven't been in a relationship in a long time and I'm not totally sure if I'm ready for that," I said. "But I do know that there's no one I'd rather do it with than you. And I'm not interested in doing those anti-relationships with anyone right now. I don't want to have sex with anyone else, I don't have feelings for anyone else. It's just you, Nick."

"And I feel the same way for you, Serah," He said, reaching his hand over for mine. "I'm not going to rush you if you aren't ready to make this something official yet. But I'm here when you are."

I squeezed his hand. "You won't get sick of waiting?"

"For you? No. You're something special. You don't get sick of waiting for something or someone as special as you."


End file.
